


Pretty Lies

by ekaheida



Category: Miraculous Ladybug
Genre: Adrinette, Angst, F/M, Kagami is a lesbian OOP, Light Angst, ML, Miraculous Ladybug - Freeform, adrien needs a hug and a nap man, and spoilers but gorilla is a better father than gabriel but SHHHH, eventually. its gonna be a slow ride, friendship is important in this one y'all, just adrien having a snowball of a mental breakdown, more tags l8er, nothing too serious, protective nathalie in chap 4 ;), theres one oc i just love in this
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2019-10-23
Updated: 2020-03-27
Packaged: 2020-12-28 19:29:17
Rating: Not Rated
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 10
Words: 25,317
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/21142004
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/ekaheida/pseuds/ekaheida
Summary: “When you’re walking across the runway, Adrien, just make sure you hold your chin up, and even if you don’t feel confident, make sure you make long, confident strides.”“Even if I don’t feel confident, mama?”His mother’s eyes crinkled, “Even if it’s not real, try to make it real to your audience. They only know you, and the clothes you’re wearing. They don’t know your story.”A.K.A The fic where Adrien has the worst month of his entire life and it spirals wildly out of his control. Modeling is tough work.





	1. Angel Cake

_“When you’re walking across the runway, Adrien, just make sure you hold your chin up, and even if you don’t feel confident, make sure you make long, confident strides.” ___  
__  
_“Even if I don’t feel confident, mama?”___  
__  
_His mother’s eyes crinkled, “Even if it’s not real, try to make it real to your audience. They only know you, and the clothes you’re wearing. They don’t know your story.” ___  
__  
Adrien held his head high, took a deep breath and he walked. One confident stride followed the other. Cameras flashed in his peripheral but he was too blinded by the stage lights to see each and every one. His mind wandered, his throat tightened in an impossible way and he blinked back the tears that he knew would give him the perfect en vogue look when the shots released in a few hours. Nobody would think there was something wrong, they’d point at it and go, __“That’s just part of the look.”  Even if it wasn’t, because he made it real to his audience, and they didn’t know his story.   
  
He turned at the end of the runway, flashed a smile that made his eyes crinkle, and walked the other way. His heart felt like it would pound out of his chest at any moment. He closed his eyes and when he opened them again he was backstage. His heart stilled and he walked back to his dressing room, letting the bright lights drown out his feelings.

It had been so long since his mother’s advice rang in his ears. When he first started modeling, he repeated it like a mantra, day after day, shoot after shoot. Sometimes he’d think about it during fencing lessons, and Chinese classes. If he held his head high, and made long confident strides, then he could do everything.   
  
The world didn’t need to know what was going on inside his head. He changed out of the runway clothes, hanging them up on their pristine velvet hanger.   
  
“Something’s bothering you, kid,” Plagg’s voice broke the cacophony in his head and Adrien turned, smiled,   
  
“I’m fine, just stressed, that’s all,” and he shrugged his shoulders like it was the easiest thing in the world, plucking a blonde hair off the shoulder cuff. It was a truly beautiful garment, hand beaded. There was no doubt that his father was a brilliant designer.   
  
Plagg floated over to land on his shoulder, face nestling against Adrien’s cheek. He leaned into it, selfishly, and sighed. It was a long day, and the exhaustion weighed heavily upon his shoulders. After that runway shoot, he had to go over to Luka’s to watch their Kitty Action rehearsal (a song that Adrien wasn’t in, something he would forever be grateful for) He enjoyed his time with his friends, and he got it preapproved by his father.   
  
That didn’t help explain the anxiety settling in the pit of his stomach, coiling up like a frightened snake.   
  
“Okay Mr. Stressed, care to put pants on?”  
  
Adrien snorted out a half laugh, “Yeah, I will. Don’t worry. How else am I supposed to show off the Agreste loungewear line?” He rolled his eyes, opening up the box his father had left him. At least it should be comfortable.   
  
And it was, he realized as he popped the sweatshirt on, combing his hair artfully back and out of his face. It was still sticky with styling products, falling in loose waves around his head. He took a makeup wipe to his face in an attempt to rid himself of the thick layer of foundation on his face. It halfway worked, and when he looked up at himself he felt like it was okay.   
  
Smeared mascara was a look, right? Oh well, he didn’t have time to take off the rest of it. He managed to jump into joggers, and toe his sneakers back on before he was grabbing his bag and rushing through the door.   
  
He didn’t stop jogging until he was out of the building, flipping the hood of the sweatshirt up. Plagg stayed by his side, tucked in the space between his neck and shoulder.   
  
“That exciting, hmm?”  
  
Adrien laughed, genuinely, “It is, it’s practically a sleepover..”  
  
Practically? Who was he kidding? It was a sleepover by all sense of the word, and his father actually _approved _it. His heart beat heavily, not with dread, but with joy.   
  
“Ohhh a sleepover! How exciting, did you remember-”  
  
“Your camembert, yes Plagg, I remembered your camembert, but you have to stay hidden. I’m only bringing you along because..”  
  
“Because anything can happen, I know, I know. And while you listen to your friends write and perform music, I’ll be making the coziest home out of your bag.”   
  
“And you call me weird,” he huffed and shook his head. The houseboat was in sight in it’s massive glory. The top of it was lit up with beautiful string lights that reflected against the inky water it sat upon, swaying slightly against the waves.  
  
Adrien took a second to compose himself, sucking a deep breath in, and exhaling it slowly. It was just a sleepover, it was so simple, but it was with so many of his friends. Marinette, Alya, Juleka, Rose, Ivan, and Luka. Nino wasn’t able to make it but it would be okay.   
  
Head high, confident strides. The text message said to just walk in so he did, and he was greeted with well- a lot- They were laughing in the practice room, it smelt like popcorn and oddly like pancakes. Plagg zipped into his bag and grinned up at him. Adrien swallowed and walked in, laughing nervously.   
  
“Sorry I’m late, I tried to get here as fast as I could.”   
  
He rubbed the back of his neck sheepishly, he really did try to get there quickly, he knew he was quite late though. What if he missed the rehearsal?   
  
“I didn’t know you wore makeup during your shoots, Adrien,” Alya was the first one to speak and she sat up from the floor. In seconds she invaded his personal space, swiping a thumb under his eye.   
  
Oh right, the smeared mascara.  
  
“Well, in shoots I uhm- no? No makeup during shoots but this was ah.. runway and those pictures are like uhm, well you know, super candid and stuff so it’s important to wear makeup so that you look alright from all angles, and you know, this is kind of the debut before the winter collection so it’s a bit more macabre,” he was pressing his fingers together, a nervous tic he’d been told to stop multiple times. He couldn’t help it, Alya was just so close and Adrien’s nerves were still shot from his modeling endeavor   
  
Juleka’s head cocks out along with Marinette’s, and Adrien felt heat rise in his cheeks. Was it that weird?   
  
“I thought you might be finally trying a punk look,” Juleka said with a smile and a little nod, hiding behind her hair again.   
  
Marinette giggled, “It would be an interesting look on you,” and she patted the spot next to her, “Both of you need to come sit!”   
  
Adrien nodded and shifted his bag, smiling at Alya. She smirked back at him and led him along. Luka smiled at him and patted the spot next to him. Adrien sat down, succesfully, between Luka and Marinette.   
  
“If I did a punk look my father would probably keel over,” he didn’t mean for the joke to come out as dark as it did but even Ivan snickered.   
  
“Or have a freaking stroke,” Alya added.  
  


“So he’s still controlling?” Luka asked, and Adrien could only shrug.   
  
“Just.. overprotective. Looking different can get you into trouble, I guess? Or get you odd looks, and I _do_ represent his brand.”  
  
Marinette sighed, “His very posh, fashion forward brand.”   
  
“Exactly!” Adrien leaned forward, crossing his legs and bringing his knee up to his chest, “But I do enjoy the modeling, I’m actually doing something new for the winter line.”  
  
“Ooh, you have to spill,” Rose spoke up, and laughed, “The winter shows are always the best! The clothes are sooo avant garde.”   
  
Adrien couldn’t remember a time he ever talked about himself so much, maybe as Chat Noir, but that didn’t count. He really did love modeling though, it was so easy for him to talk about. 

He nodded to Rose’s comment, and then to Marinette and Juleka’s questioning, wide eyes.   
  
“The winter show is always more couture, it’s not about wearable fashion stuff like this,” he fluffs up his sweatshirt, “Which is going to be apart of the new Agreste lounge slash sportswear collection- I digress. The winter shows, it’s where designers from all over the world are assigned a model and they design a fashion piece based off of them. This is going to be the first show that I’m doing just by myself- and on stage in general. I won’t even know which designer I’ll be working with until next week.”   
  
“So instead of it being about wearable clothes, it’s basically an art show? Kind of like pop versus Indie?” Luka asked.   
  
Adrien nodded, “It’s exactly like that. The Ageste brand is definitely a more commercial brand, but the brand itself hosts smaller designers to come to Paris once a year and show off their art. Every design is made to the model’s body, which means it’s all one of a kind. Whatever I’ll be wearing? It’ll be the only one and that’s.. Exciting.”  
  
It was also heart racing. He used to watch his mother walk across those runways, in gowns with multiple tiers, intricate beading, and gorgeous patterns. Gowns that billowed around her and made her look like a floating angel surrounded by twinkling lights. This would be the first year that he walked that stage in her place, there was so much weight to it, emotionally, and publicly. If he screwed up on stage, he wouldn’t hear the end of it from his father. .   
  
And he’d disappoint himself, but he would never say that out loud.   
  
“That sounds absolutely incredible! So many designers and garments in one place. It must be such a hub of inspiration,” Marinette bounced her fists up and down, “What I’d give to be one of those designers.”  
  
Adrien tilted his head, “You could be, one day. They are randomly chosen, and it’s annual. As long as you keep applying, you could totally get in!”   
  
“You think so?”  
  
“Marinette, I’ve seen your designs, I _know_ so.”   
  
Alya elbowed Marinette and Marinette squawked. Everyone laughed and Luka stood back up, Ivan followed.   
  
“We’ll all be ready for that winter collection, but in the meantime, why don’t we get some practice done. It’ll help us brainstorm in this creative hour of night.   
  
Rose bounced up, “I’ve been working on new lyrics!! Here,” she dug around her bag and handed everyone a piece of printed paper. Adrien shifted to scoot closer to the couch, sitting with his back against the seat, giving the rest of them room to perform with their instruments.   
  
He couldn’t focus on the words on the page, and peaked up over the top of it to look at Marinette. She was probably gathering inspiration for the new costume designs for the song. She took out her sketchbook and everything.   
  
Adrien leaned in a little closer, watching her pencil move across the page but not really seeing what she was drawing. He wasn’t close enough to tell what exactly it was. A bodysuit, maybe? A pantsuit? Who knew, certainly not him. He got lost in her movement before realizing that the rehearsal was starting.   
  
It was like coming back up from being underwater, and he realized he must have spaced out at some point. Marinette’s eyes were focused on the band Adrien looked there too, at Ivan on the drums, Rose singing, Luka on guitar, and Juleka on bass.   
  
The song hit him then, resonating a deep chord somewhere in his heart and his throat tightened up again. He should have read the lyrics, it would have made him feel less stupid but in that moment his brain caught up with his body when Rose sang.   
  
_“Maybe we’re just friends, but I want more.”_   
  
Adrien hit his fist into the flat palm of his hand, “It’s a love song.”   
  
Rose giggled into the mic and for the second time that night, Adrien felt his face going hot.   
  
“Sorry, I promise I read the lyrics it just.. It didn’t hit me until now, hearing it out loud.”  
  
Marinette had her hand over her mouth and Alya nudged him, “I’m glad you caught onto the meaning behind the words.”   
  
“I never did claim to be a great poet, or understanding poetry,” he scratched behind his ear and laughed with them, “Still, I think it’s great. It’s a refreshing take on a love song it’s so.. In your face!”   
  
Rose smiled, her cheeks turning pink, “I’m glad that you caught it! If you caught it, then our audience certainly will!”   
  
Everyone nodded, and Adrien settled back against the couch, glad that his spotlight moment had finally ended. He still felt how his cheeks burned and he kept his face clasped in his hands to hide himself. One day he’d actually read the things that were handed to him, and read them well, so that he wouldn’t embarrass himself like that again.  
  
They resumed rehearsal and Adrien put his head down on his knee. He was tired, beyond tired, and it was finally catching up to him. All he wanted to do was lay down but he was enjoying his time with his friends. They were all so.. Lively, and happy. It was an energy he wasn’t used to, but he appreciated to a level he would never be able to describe in words.   
  
He felt safe in the presence of his friends, undoubtedly safe. The beat of the song throbbed in his ears as he nodded off, cheek falling flush against the couch cushion.   
  
\---

  
  



	2. Angel Cake

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Adrien Meets his Designer and he and Ladybug have a lowkey boring talk. He loves his friends

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> hgnh no editing we die like men o nthis hill

Adrien swung his legs back and forth off of his chair- well barstool, whatever. It was a seat, and he was sitting in it, which made it a chair by every sense of the word. He didn’t expect to be added to a groupchat so soon but he was having a lot of fun. Everybody was hilarious, he just wished he could add more to the conversation. It was nice to read though, it kept him distracted, left that anxious, crawly feeling out of his throat. He felt like he wasn’t alone. 

He was supposed to be meeting his designer, and he was excited, but also exhausted at the same time. Fencing practice ran late, his father scolded him, and on top of it he was out patrolling until late late. Adrien felt like his eyes had bags and then his bags had bags. Luckily, he didn’t. It was quite honestly, Miraculous. 

He hooked his ankles onto the chair again, putting his phone away and looking up just in time to see a woman marching his way. Her hair was the biggest Adrien had ever seen, curly, and fiery orange. He went to stand up to greet her, immediately outstretching his hand and offering a smile. 

“You must be-”

Her lights lit up and she cut him off before he could finish, “I’m Megara!!! Your designer for the winter show, oh my gosh aren’t you just precious in person?” 

Adrien felt his cheeks flush, “Oh uhm, thanks?” He wasn’t typically called precious, in fact he probably hadn’t been called something that cute in a very, very long time. It caught him off guard, and Megara shook his hand furiously, 

“I wanna skip the small talk because we’ll be together so much. Mind if I take your measurements? I’m gonna take your measurements,” she whipped out a tape measure and Adrien didn’t have much of a choice but to move where she directed him. She was a whirlwind of a person and he could barely keep up. 

But it was a nice change of pace, really. It was funny but he didn’t laugh, or at least tried not to. She stood in front of him when she was done taking his measurements and she took his face in his hands, “You’re stinking cute, I almost can’t stand it. I can’t believe I get to work with you for this masterpiece, you’re gonna wear my baby so well!” 

“Oh, have you already started working on it?”

“Absolutely not,” Megara laughed and dragged a stool in front of Adrien’s seat, “Now sit down, do whatever you want but sit and I’m gonna figure out what I wanna put you in. What have you not worn yet? I want to do something different, amazing, outstanding,” her hands popped into the air with every adjective, fingers snapping, fluttering. She was as vibrant on the inside as she was on the outside, Adrien could already tell. 

He plopped back down in his chair, crossed one leg over the other and shrugged his shoulders. He’d never been so.. Casual with anyone, especially while modeling, or- designing? He wasn’t sure which category this would fall under. 

“I’ve worn suits, casual wear, casual formal, basic men’s fashion, I think?” He pursed his lips while he thought about it, “Nothing boundary pushing, this is a whole new leap for my career.” 

“Ugh, a shame, your face is far too unique to be used for simple fashion, no offense to your old man or anything,” her nose crinkled and she sniffed, pulling out a tablet and stylus from her bag and clicking both of them on. She twirled the stylus through her fingers and tapped the screen. 

“None taken, it’s supposed to be wearable fashion for the wealthy, I guess. Not as gaudy as gucci, but still high end. Nice, comfortable, simple, yet still elegant.” 

Megara’s lips pursed and she looked back down at her tablet, stylus scratching against the screen.

Adrien watched for a few minutes before pulling out his phone. Jesus, he already missed a hundred messages, he wasn’t gonna read back. 

Especially since well…

Alya: ADRIEEEN WHERE ARE YOU

Nino: BrOOOOO WHERE DID YOU GOOOOO 

Luka: he’s probably busy-

Alya: mMM DONT CARE THIS IS AN EMERGENCY 

He blinked a few times, and typed back. 

Adrien: I’m here, I’m here. What’s up? 

Alya: MARINETTES DESIGNING ANOTHER POSTER FOR JAGGED STONE, ARE YOU COMING TO THE DESIGN PARTY?

Adrien looked back up at Megara, and back down at his phone, 

Adrien: I can’t. This modeling thing is going for another hour and then I have to go home. My dad’s been strict on my schedule since the rehearsal, sorry :(. Tell her to send pictures here though! 

Alya: U r SO lucky her parents canceled the party young man, I swear. We’re gonna get you to the next one! 

Nino: even if we have to steal u! 

He couldn’t help but smile at his screen, at least he didn’t have to feel bad about not being able to come. He wished he could spend more time with his friends, they were his entire world, sometimes. Or they would be his world, if he had a choice in the matter. 

Adrien: Haha,,thank you guys :) I gotta get back to this thing though. See you. 

He looked back up at Megara, who squinted back. 

“Did I uhm- miss something?”

“No,” she said, leaning back, “Before we wrap this up so you can go do your other.. Business,” she waved her hand, “Do you know how to walk in heels?”

Adrien swallowed, and smiled, “No, but I can learn if you want me to.”

Megara grinned back at him, almost all teeth. It reminded him of the way Kagami smiled in a weird way. 

“Perfect.. Perfect.. I have a feeling we’ll be getting to know a lot about each other, Adrien.”

He smiled, “Let’s hope.”   
\- - - 

Truth be told he didn’t have anything to do, or a modeling shoot to continue after meeting Megara. He hated lying to his friends but well, he couldn’t just out and go, Oops sorry, I’m Chat Noir so I can’t see my friend’s doing the things they enjoy doing. Although he was nearly positive he could say that and people would think he was joking. 

He ducked into an alleyway and transformed quietly, slinking back out the other side and jumping onto the nearest rooftop. Paris, like always was busy, the lights of the city twinkling as the sun started to set. He actually enjoyed night patrols, as odd as it sounded. The air was always cool, the breeze refreshing. They helped clear all the gunk of daily life out of his head. 

It also made him feel more like himself, like he could peel his civilian identity off like a piece of clothing. He didn’t feel like he was entirely faking it, but as Chat he felt.. So much more comfortable, more free. 

He walked along the rooftops, jumping whenever he needed to. It was a quiet night, most everyone was home early to spend time with their families. He helped a little boy find his way back to his parents in the park. 

But other than that it was quiet. The streets finally cleared up and the only noise left came from electric systems and air conditioners. He sat perched on on the rooftop of a high office building, legs swinging back and forth off the ledge. He had about twenty minutes before he would head back home for the night, and he wanted to enjoy every second. 

“Slow night, isn’t it?”

Adrien jumped and turned, grinning when his eyes landed on Red and Black, “Dreadfully, M’lady. What have you been up to?” 

Ladybug shrugged and sat next to him, “Same thing as you, just on the other side of the city, obviously,” she rolled her eyes in that playful way of hers and Adrien’s heart felt warm. “You look more tired than normal, I was worried.”

“You have no reason to be,” he laughed, “I just started a new activity and I guess I got into it a little too hard.” 

“Oh, and what activity could that be, Chatton?”

Adrien thought for a second, looking down at his lap. He shifted the way he sat and worried his lip, “You can’t make fun of me.” 

“I won’t, I promise.”

He was silent for another moment, sucking in a tight breath, “I’ve been, kind of.. Dabbling in fashion design, just like- not a lot, I mean I can’t really draw that well- not even fashion design just like history and stuff. Got really into it last night and well, kind of a new hobby, I guess?” He didn’t realize how fas the spit all of it out but there, the half truth was out in the often. 

And Ladybug just smiled fondly at him, “I think that’s great. The fashion world is really interesting, isn’t?”

“It is, I just, I’m glad I get to sort of be apart of it now,” he grinned, and looked down at the ground, “Really glad.”


	3. Unravel in Slow Motion

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Ladybug has a date with a boy. Not THE boy, but still a boy. and Chat? Well, he's loveless.

“Yes! Work, work, step, step. You’re selling me 6’2 realness, Adrien!” 

Truth be told, Adrien did know how to walk in heels. He couldn’t remember when exactly he learned, maybe when Reflektdoll happened? Before then? Hell, maybe it was one of his new super hidden talents, or less super hidden now. True, the heels he was wearing were only three inches, but still, it added a lot to how he looked. 

His legs looked longer, and his posture portrayed a more graceful and delicate appearance. They made him less blocky and more...smooth. He couldn’t help but compare himself to his Alter ego. He moved almost exactly how he did as Chat, looser, more agile. 

But still remained elegant in the way Chat definitely wasn’t. Adrien understood why women wore heels, at least now he did. They were painful, his ankles were already killing him and he’d only been walking for a half hour, but they added to everything. Changed up his entire vibe, rocked his world, the whole works. 

He slowly stepped off the runway stage, Megara’s hand supporting him the entire way down,

“Ugh! I love it, you’re such a doll. We’ll work up to platforms or stilettos, I have a whole.. Vibe going, I swear you’ll look stunning, I sound crazy now but soon I’ll have the mock-up done.”

Adrien smiled, “Take your time, this is your art, you can’t rush it.”

Megara’s lips wobbled before she grinned, “You’re right! I can’t, besides, the show is in two months, we have so much time,” she swung her hair over her shoulder, taking her tablet out and making a few notes. 

Meanwhile he sat back down on the ground, taking off the heels and putting his sneakers back on. He sat for a moment longer than normal, pinching the bridge of his nose while his head throbbed. He hoped he could stave off his steadily increasing headache for the rest of the day. He still had to go home, do homework, and head out as Chat Noir again because well, he was covering for Ladybug. 

She had a date with a boy, not the boy but a boy. Thinking about it made his heart drop somewhere in his stomach. He shouldn’t have felt like he was being rejected, because he had been so many times. 

It was more like the rejection solidified in his mind was all. He and Ladybug were perfect partners after all, he hoped that that would extend to romance as well. He fell in love with the heroine at first sight, it was a hard thing to shake off. 

But for her happiness, he could at the very least fake it. He could hold his chin up and be there for her as her best friend. Especially since she was finally moving on from the jerkwad she was in love with before. 

But it still hurt either way. His chest tightened and he bit his lip, gazing at the ground to recompose himself. He needed to just stop thinking, he wished he could turn his brain off, get a break away from himself.

He jolted back into reality when a cold can pressed against his forehead, looking up quickly. Megara grinned back at him, pulling back her cold can of espresso. 

“Welcome back, Space Cadet. I thought you had somewhere to be after this. Looked like you were a little too into your thoughts for someone as young as you are.”

Adrien smiled a little, “I do have somewhere to go, I must’ve spaced out, wasn’t really thinking.” He wished he wasn’t thinking at all. He tied his laces up Megara helped haul him back off the floor. 

His ankles screamed at him and he sighed a quick breath, “Thank you. So, same time tomorrow.”

“Of course, and always.. Hm… stilettos.. Or platforms, screw it! I’ll bringing both. And the mock-up!” She pointed her finger in the air as she walked away and Adrien shook his head, smiling. He grabbed his bag off the floor and made his way through the door. 

\--- 

Adrien tapped his pencil against the side of his notebook, scrolling through his reading homework. He was mostly making notes, pointing out specific analogies, marking certain verb usage. It was easy but still tedious. He felt like he had to read every page at least five times to get the words to stick and make actual connections. He felt.. Tired, in a really weird way, like he had a lead weight strapped to his back. 

He turned his tablet off and leaned back in his chair until his back popped. He was already ahead on homework so .. It wouldn’t be a big deal if he didn’t finish next week’s tonight right? He could always do it tomorrow, after his patrol, after getting some sleep. He could probably finish it in the car before school and on the way to fencing practice, or with Megara. Maybe her opinion would help?

She did seem to have a knack for finding the weird where normalcy existed. She was the same woman who slapped him in a pair of heels and said: mush. 

He needed to clear his head. He rubbed his temples and stood up, walking over to his seemingly permanently open window. 

Well, not seemingly, it was always open. His excuse? The fresh air helped him stay calm, which it did. That wasn’t a lie, but it was also his escape route, for emergencies, of course.  
Chat Noir related emergencies. 

He transformed quickly and jumped out of the window, jumping from rooftop to rooftop with the aid of his staff. The air was quite , chilly, and the breeze was stronger than normal. Winter was going to strike Paris soon and he didn’t know if he’d be ready for it. 

The lights twinkled beneath him and he perched himself on a rooftop, gazing at how the lights reflected off the Seine. It was beautifully gorgeous. He smiles down at the reflection and looked back up. It was a beautiful night, despite the chill. 

He hugged himself and walked along the ledge of a building, whistling to himself. There wasn’t a leaf, pebble, or hair out of the ordinary just… 

Music?

His ears twitched, 

Guitar music! 

It wasn’t often he got to hear the music playing so late at night. He quietly hopped around, rooftop to rooftop until he smelt candlewax and.. Saw it.

Well them. 

Marinette and Luka, sitting in a long empty cafe, candles surrounding them. 

Adrien remembered when he tried to do that for Ladybug but she.. Never showed. 

Marinette laughed and for some reason it didn’t bring him the same joy it usually brought him, no- this feeling was different but he hadn’t felt it in a long time. 

It ached, in his chest. Luka strummed his guitar and the melody echoed down the street. A lump built in Adrien’s throat and he stepped back, and away. 

How foolish was he? Almost in tears over.. Over what, exactly? Marinette was his friend he should’ve been happy for her, elated, and so was Luka. He wasn’t blind, he could see how they worked together it just. 

Felt wrong.. It felt wrong to watch. They obviously wanted this to be private if they waited till so late at night. Maybe Marinette’s parents disapproved? Thoughts raced through his head and he couldn’t think through any of them. 

His ears flattened against his head. He glanced over his shoulder, watching as Marinette hid a bright red face in her hands while Luka kissed the top of her head. 

Loneliness, the feeling was loneliness, and it tore at his heart. It made him feel numb all over, his fingers and toes tingling as he hurdled from rooftop to the sidewalk, hiding himself on the next street over. 

Tears stung his eyes while he walked back home, but he didn't get it- why was he so upset? It was just a date and he already knew that Marinette and Luka- mainly Luka, had feelings for Marinette. 

He wasn’t that blind! 

Adrien didn’t know when he got back into his room. He blinked and looked up and plagg was floating in front of him, 

“Kid.. What’s wrong?” 

“Nothing, it’s nothing- I’m being stupid,” he whispered, wiping at his face. “When.. when did I detransform?” And why was his voice so raw? 

“I detransformed us after you got home, you weren’t answering me! It freaked me out, it was like hello, the lights were on but Adrien wasn’t home!” 

Adrien clasped his hands in his lap, looking down shamefully, “Sorry, I.. I don’t know what got into me. I guess I freaked a little.” 

“That loveless, huh?” Adrien swatted his hand and Plagg dodged with a laugh, “I tease, I tease. By the way, I gave myself my cheese so all you have to do, sleepy-head, is get changed and get some sleep.. You really need it.” 

“I will, I will. Just go lay down,” he waved him off and got up, changing into a pair of fleece pants and another hoodie. He slipped on a pair of socks and walked into his bathroom to brush his teeth. 

He didn't look at his reflection, 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> finally getting into the sauce of the 'plot' (HaAH) aka the downward slope, the climax, u know what i mean. thank u for reading my passion project!!!!~


	4. Apple Tree

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Black really IS Adrien's color, and Nathalie is a good woman, she cares.

Adrien made quick work of getting dressed, barely looking at himself as he changed into his regular tee shirt and.. Another jacket, yeah- thinner than a hoodie though, still white, and black jeans. He fixed his hair like normal, brushing his teeth and spitting. 

He looked at himself in the mirror and took a deep breath, “There, we’re gonna have a good day today,” he smiled at his reflection and turned away. He smoothed a hand through his hair, making sure it was styled properly before stepping out of the bathroom.

“Well you look better today, black really is your color, y’know? I knew I picked a good holder.” 

“Master Fu picked a great holder, thank you,” he corrected with a grin, filling his backpack with his school supplies. He left his homework out though, the tablet and notebook for the car ride to school. 

He plucked his phone off the charger and sent a quick message: 

_ Adrien_: Good morning everyone :)!! I hope you all slept well. 

_Nino_: Morning brooooo! 

_Juleka_: It is.. Morning. 

_Rose_: A gorgeous morning too!!! 

Adrien smiled at his phone and put it away, turning off the notifications for the day, lord knows it’d be blowing up otherwise. He stepped out of his room, zipping Plagg into his bag on the way out.

He twisted the ring on his finger on the way down the stairs, whistling quietly as he walked into the dining room. He didn’t feel.. Particularly hungry though, he wasn’t hungry at all these days. Maybe it was nerves? Either way, he sat down at his normal spot and started on his homework. 

It was easier to read, at least, now that he had a clear head to think things through better. He sat like that for ten minutes before Nathalie came in and right as he opened his mouth to greet her, she said, 

“What happened to your hands?” 

What? 

He looked down at his hands and winced, yeah- his claws must’ve dug into his palms and there wasn’t a miraculous ladybug that would fix that any time soon. Little crescent scabs marked the inside of his hands and he shrugged, 

“I must’ve been clenching my fists in my sleep?” 

Nathalie frowned, standing next to him and taking his hand in hers, looking over the little scabs, “Nightmares?” She questioned. 

Adrien shook his head, then corrected it with a shrug. “I honestly can’t remember if it was one or not.. Had to be, I guess?” 

“Would you like bandages for them?”

“No! I mean, sorry, sidetracked,” he gestured to his homework, “I meant to say, they’re already scabbed over, so bandages wouldn’t do more than bring attention to them. I’m fine, it doesn’t even hurt, I promise.”

He offered her a smile and Nathalie sighed. Her fingers twitched like she wanted to reach out. 

And unexpectedly, she did. Her hand squeezed his shoulder and she smoothed the other through his hair. Adrien fought not to lean into it, less he reveal how much he actually craved the small affection. He really was a touch starved cat, wasn’t he? 

“You haven’t had nightmares since.. Since your mother,” Nathalie said, “And I know this time of year is particularly hard..” But she didn’t finish her sentence. 

Adrien stiffened and looked away, yeah.. It really was coming upon that time of year, huh? He tried not to think about it, and so far, he had been successful. This would be his second holiday season without his mother, and the Agreste’s second holiday with an empty manor void of any feeling. 

His mother used to love decorating. She’d spend hours making sure the mansion looked to her creative standard. It would always be warm, and inviting, and she’d say she would plan a party but in reality she would invite a lot of important people over and force them to make nice while she charmed them. She would forget to plan the most important part but everyone had fun with her on a whim ideas anyways.

“I’m just.. Worried,” Nathalie finished, “About you, because I know it’s hard but you’re not alone,” her eyes drifted towards his father’s office. 

Adrien pulled away from her hand, and took it in his own, “I’ll be okay, I might actually have holiday plans, if father lets me. We didn’t have anything planned last year so I’m guessing this year will be the same?” 

Nathalie nodded, “Most likely, yes.” 

“You don’t think father would mind if I tried to be with friends this year?” 

Nathalie didn’t speak and Adrien sunk into his chair. She worried her lip and Adrien knew that it would most likely be a no. He’d spend another Christmas in his room, probably, or out as Chat Noir. Maybe that would be his Christmas plan, a patrol. It was better than nothing, though. 

“I will speak to him about it, and suggest that being with your friends would be better for you, this go around. Just let me know when a plan finally gets set in stone, and I’ll bring it up.” 

Adrien grinned, “Thank you, Nathalie,” and he stood up from his seat, embracing her in a tight hug. 

Nathalie’s arms wrapped around him and they spent what felt like forever in a close embrace before she pulled away, fixing his hair again. 

“But you still have school today, and you can’t be late so let’s go out to the car.” 

“Yes ma’am,” he put the rest of his stuff in his bag, pushing Plagg into an inner pocket before zipping it up, following Nathalie out of the dining room. 

When he got in the car he pulled his phone out again, opening the groupchat, 

_Adrien:_ I might be able to spend Christmas with friends this year! 

_Alya:_ OMFG, no WAY, your dad is seriously letting you? Omg we have to plan something big! 

_Nino_: YESSSSS

_Adrien_: It’s still in the air but Nathalie said if a plan is set in stone, then she’ll bring it up to him and that most likely means a yes, I think. Or at least I hope it’s a yes. 

_Juleka_: Holy shit dude, we do need to plan something big. 

_Alya:_ Perhaps we should hold.. An after school meeting to discuss it ;)? 

_Adrien:_ We should! That’s a good idea. 

_Luka_: That’s very exciting, I’ll try to stop by to hear about what’s going on. 

Adrien had to stop at Luka’s response, holding his phone carefully. Luka was still his friend, he couldn’t act some type of way because.. Well, because Marinette liked him. They were obviously a good pair, besides- they didn’t even know he knew. 

Chin up. He looked at himself in the rear view mirror and back at the screen. 

_ Adrien_: See you guys soon and if I don’t, after school :)! 

_ Marinette_: OMGGG IT’LL BE OUR FIRST CHRISTMAS WITH ADRIEN!!!! 

He tried not to smile, really tried not to smile. He turned his phone off and held his face in his hands, looking down at his lap. 

It was going to be his first Christmas with friends, he couldn’t wait. 

“Have a good day at school, Adrien,” Nathalie looked up at him and Gorilla looked at him from the rearview mirror. 

He smiled at both of them, “Thank you, oh- can…” He hesitated for a second, blinking a few times, “Can I have an extra half hour until I’m picked up after school? We want to talk about the holiday plans, is that okay?” 

Nathalie looked through her notes, and then flicked her eyes up at Gorilla, who nodded. 

“I don’t see why not, just be at the entrance.” 

Adrien nodded, “Thank you! I’ll see you guys after school!” 

He grabbed his stuff and bolted out of the car, bounding up the school steps until he was in the courtyard. 

Chloe was the first to greet him, skipping over, “Adrikins! You look so good today. Black really is a good color on you,” she pointed down to his legs. 

“Oh, uhm- thanks?” He rubbed the back of his neck, “Wanted to try something new, wasn’t super sure about it.” 

“Well, I think it looks great. Everyone knows that black is a slimming color, not that you need it, of course.” 

Black was indeed, very slimming, and sleek. Adrien knew because he wore it nearly every night as Chat Noir. 

But that was his secret. So instead he smiled, “Thank you.”

Chloe was about to talk when Nino came racing over, immediately throwing his arm over his shoulder and pulling him close. 

“Dude! I can’t believe you might actually like, get to be out of your house around the holidays. This is gonna be so tight!” 

Chloe frowned and Adrien laughed nervously. He could tell the look on her face, she used to attend his mother’s parties too. They used to run around together, playing with the lights and chasing each other with ‘hornets’, a game his father disapproved of but Chloe and Adrien loved it. 

“Hopefully, it’s still in the air though, hopefully my father lets me though.” 

Chloe crossed her arms and Adrien blinked a few times, “We don’t have anything set in stone but when it is, I’ll let you know.”

“Ugh,” she scoffed, flipping her ponytail over her shoulder, “You better! Just text me about it when you know, bye-bye,” she blew him a kiss and walked off. 

Nino groaned, “I seriously don’t know how you’re so patient with her, man. I’d lose my mind.”

“She’s better once you get to know her,” or she used to be, when they were kids she was actually very kind. Adrien still couldn’t figure out when that kindness stopped. Every now and again he’d see it flicker across her face before she’d snuff it out like a flame, as if her kindness was something she hated. 

Adrien could never figure out what happened to her. He sighed and leaned against Nino. 

“Bro! Nice jeans, I don’t think I’ve ever seen you in straight up black before, sick.” 

“Why is everyone pointing out my pants??”

Nino frowned, “Cause, dude, you only ever wear like, blue jeans. This is nice though, black is really your color, it kinda brings out your eyes.”

“Does it?” 

“Totally!” 

Adrien laughed, “Alright, I’ll try to incorporate more black into my wardrobe.” 

“Just don’t go full goth though.”

He grinned, “Oh no, I plan to go beyond goth, Nino, it’ll be my new aesthetic. 

Nino shoved him with a laugh and Adrien shoved back until they were both laughing as Alya and Marinette came over. 

“So it’s a Christmas party,” Alya clapped her hands together, “I’m totally planning it, we just need a place, some game ideas, oh my god, we should do a secret Santa! That would be so much fun.” 

Adrien looked at Marinette and then back at Alya, “Secret Santa…?”

“Have you never done a secret Santa?” Alya asked. Adrien shook his head,

“Nope, haven’t heard of it either.”

Alya sighed, dramatically rubbing her temples, “Marinette, explain to the poor man what a secret Santa is” 

Marinette laughed nervously and Adrien smiled at her, 

“Well, a secret Santa is like.. Where you draw names out of a hat and you get a present for the person you drew, except you don’t tell them who you are until after you give them the gift! Normally there’s a uhm… a budget and..”

Adrien nodded along, steadily getting more excited. The idea of a secret Santa sounded like so much fun and he bounced on his heels, chin up. Nothing changed, Marinette was still his friend. The anxiety that clutched him so badly last night turned to dust in her forward presence. 

“You’re not supposed to get anything big, really it’s just like, fun stuff, it can be gag gifts or something serious. I used to make people macarons for secret Santa’s, or little stuffed dolls. It’s up to you though!” 

“That sounds fun! I can’t believe I’ve never heard of it before, we should definitely do that.” 

He liked giving gifts to his friends, he wasn’t sure if he was good at it, but he certainly liked doing it. He rocked back on his heels and waved his hands excitedly, 

“Looks like someone’s excited,” Nino pulled him in for another side hug and Adrien put his arm around his waist.

Alya grinned, “Awe, I think it’s sweet. But we’re totally gonna make this party bangin’ levels of awesome, right Marinette-.. Uh, Marinette?”

Adrien looked up and Marinette walked over, taking his hand in hers, flipping it over so his palm was face up. She traced the scabs with her nails gingerly, and looked back up at him. 

He tried to fight back the heat that spread to his face. His ears felt warm and he laughed nervously, 

“Uhm, Marinette?” 

“Are you okay?” 

Adrien paused, still in some state of shock. He felt like his body was there but his mind was on the outside and he was watching himself. 

And then he was knocked back in, and he sucked in a quick breath in through his nose, grinning. 

“Yeah! Don’t worry about my hands I uhm, must’ve had some freak nightmare last night, and I guess I tend to clench my fists in my sleep.. When I’m scared? I dunno. I can’t even remember what I was dreaming about.” 

Marinette’s lips pursed, “Shouldn’t you be wearing bandages?” 

Why did he feel like he was being grilled?? It wasn’t a big deal, right? 

“Oh, because they’re already scabbed over, I didn’t see a point. I plan on wrapping them once I shower tonight though, just to stay on the healthy side.” 

“...Good,” and then she seemed to come into herself and she gasped, backing up, 

“I’m so sorry, I was totally in your business it was just that- you looked hurt and your hands are- well they’re really soft and if you’re having nightmares you should drink chamomile before bed-” Her words jumbled together and Adrien offered a patient smile. 

“Thank you, Marinette. I appreciate your concern, but if anything is wrong, I’ll be sure to let you guys know about it first. You’re my friends, after all.” He squeezed Nino and Nino squeezed back. 

Alya tossed an arm over Marinette, rubbing her back before flashing a grin Nino’s way. 

“Although it looks like a certain friend cares a little too much. Handsy there, aren’t you Nino?” 

Nino laughed, curling a lock of Adrien’s hair around his finger and damn it felt weirdly intimate. His ears started burning, “Well, if some people won’t make their move, like, I will,” 

“Oh my god!” Alya snorted out a laugh and Adrien couldn’t help but chuckle nervously. 

His eyes met Marinette’s and he realized her face was probably just as red as his. 

So he smiled, and held is chin up. 

And then he looked at Nino, “As if you could ever handle me,” he went to pull Nino’s arm off but was instead met with arms encircling his waist,

“Nah dude, I can handle like, all of you, all the time.”

Adrien couldn’t help it, he burst out laughing. Nino let go of his waist and laughed with him, slapping him on the back. 

Alya rolled her eyes, “Ugh, you’re both too much sometimes, let’s go to class before your foolery makes us late.” 

“Yes ma’am,” they all said in unison, following Alya to Madame Bustier’s room. 

  
  


**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Hi yes this chapter was mostly just some cheesy buildup because if there's anything I love, it's Adrien having friends. But I also wanted to take the time to thank BFG and MuteHero86 for their incredibly kind comments!! They mean so much to me and I've been rereading them over and over since they popped up in my inbox! 
> 
> I actually wrote this chapter the day after I published the one before this one but wanted to space out when I posted by at least a couple of days because I was so inspired. Thank you for your support!!


	5. You and I will Never Meet

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Ladybug and Chat have a heart to heart, turns out their problems are more similar than they think.

The party plans had been set, the day after Adrien walked across the runway, they were meeting at Marinette’s house to have their Friendmas. It was exciting. Every time he thought about it his heart raced in his chest. 

But it also added another layer of stress onto what he was already doing. The week leading up to the show, he would be less available. Going immediately from school to the studio, making sure everything was perfect for the Winter Show.

He still had another week before that week, he told himself. Short notice, yes, but that was how the Winter Show always was. It was a test of art, no preplanning, just quick beauty for a single night and whatever Megara made for him would be displayed in a fashion museum, or a collector’s home. That would probably be the best thing that could happen for her. She was a talented designer, she deserved for more than a spot of glory. She deserved an entire show dedicated to her work, her passion. 

Would she even get that? Would he be able to pull off her design well enough to get her further in her career? Will another designer even consider bringing her on? These questions kept Adrien awake at night, staring thoughtfully at his ceiling like it would talk back and open up a world of answers. 

“Chatton, you’re clenching your fists again,” Ladybug spoke softly, putting her hand atop his fists.

“Sorry, sorry,” he sighed, unclenching his hands, “It’s a bad habit..” He didn't realize he was zoning out in the first place. He must've been so far in his own head..

“Doesn’t it hurt with your claws?” Her head tilted curiously and he stared down at his lap, shrugging. 

“Not much? I mean, I can feel that my claws are digging in but it’s not like some extravagant, searing pain. I guess I’ve been doing it for so long that my brain doesn’t register it as real pain anymore, who knows?” He tried to laugh, emphasis on tried. 

Ladybug took his hand in hers and flipped it over. Through his gloves, there weren’t any marks, which he felt lucky about. But that also meant he must’ve been digging into his palms pretty hard two nights ago. 

“Is something bothering you? You’ve been quiet lately too, I worry about you being..”

“Akumatized, I know, I know,” he took his hand away, cracking his knuckles and leaning back against the rooftop. “It’s not that serious-”

“Ah yes, and how the many people of Paris become akumatized, right? For very serious reasons?” Ladybug snapped, eyes narrowing, “It can happen for small reasons too, but you have to treat your emotions seriously.” 

He rolled his eyes with a sigh, “I don’t want to argue about it.” 

“Then tell me what’s eating you, Chat, please. We tell each other everything, remember?” 

He did remember, but he didn’t even know where to begin talking about it. 

“You know I can’t give you details because that would potentially reveal my identity to you, right?” 

“Of course I do-”

“And what’s eating me is kind of specific to what goes on in my life, and it’s embarrassing that I’m.. this upset about it. Not even upset just...anxious, I guess?” 

Ladybug paused, so Adrien kept talking, throwing his hands in the air flippantly. 

“Yes, I know it’s so shocking, isn’t it? I, the great, handsome, talented Chat Noir, sometimes gets so anxious he has to remind himself to chin up and pretend like nothing is going on when everything is in fact, going on, in my head.” 

“You don’t talk to anyone about that?”

“I’m currently talking to you about it, my lady.”

Ladybug rolled her eyes, “I meant like, a professional.” 

Adrien shrugged, drawing a knee up to his chest and holding it while he looked down at the passing cars below.

“If I saw a professional, it would make my family look bad. It’s just.. One of those things, I don’t know how to explain it. I mean, it’s not a big deal, I only really get like this once or twice a year, so what’s the point? I’ll get over it.." He always got over it.

“I guess I don’t understand that,” Ladybug pursed her lips and copied the way Adrien sat. 

“My family is caring, if something was wrong, they’d want me to talk to them about it so we could figure it out together.” 

“Yeah, my family is more of the, sit and stew until all your emotions bubble out of you like a pot of water left on high and you end up hurting each other. I’m not saying it’s good, trust me, I.. it’s one of the things I dislike the most about being in my family. If we would talk to each other, we’d all be happier people.” 

Ladybug sighed, “Maybe, you could borrow my parents for a day?” She joked. 

Adrien snorted out a laugh, “No thanks, I’m used to my dad by now. He’ll lock himself in his office and brood until the day he kicks the bucket.”

“That’s kind of morbid..”

“But it’s the truth, he won’t seek help, won’t talk to me, I mean we were never particularly close to begin with.” 

“... I’m sorry to hear that.”

“Don’t be, there’s nothing either of us can do about it. I’ll just wish on every star that one day he’ll snap out of it and realize the damage he’s doing to himself and our family. I hope he’ll get the help he needs, before my mom left he was so.. So close to actually going to therapy.” 

He stopped, unclenching his fists again when he felt Ladybug’s hand on his. “Sorry, I overshared a little bit.”

“You had a lot to get off your chest, it’s okay. I told you to tell me what was eating you, remember?” She offered a kind smile, ruffling his hair and pulling him close into her shoulder for a half hug. “Give it time, and patience. Your dad will come around if he wants all of you to be happy.” 

He smiled, and nodded, “Yeah.. maybe he will.”

But Adrien knew that would never happen, because his father simply wasn’t one of those men that could face his feelings head on.

“Now tell me about your date! I’m curious, was the boy nice, he didn’t do anything weird?” He grinned at her and Ladybug snorted out a laugh, pushing him off. 

“You nosy little cat, it was- it was a fine date, it was nice, actually. He was sweet.. And that’s all the details I’m gonna give you.”

“Awe.. so was he any better than ‘the’,” he put airquotes around the word, “Boy.” 

Ladybug shrugged, then sighed, “That’s where I’m conflicted, Chat. This boy is nice but I just learned something about The Boy and I don’t.. Know what to do.” 

“What did you learn?”

“Well, I thought he was dating a girl for a few months but it turns out that they’ve been broken up for at least a month and a half and I was none the wiser- I focused so much on the new boy that I just.. I don’t know. And now that he’s open, I’m not sure what I’ll do. It’s not like I can talk to him directly anyways.” 

Adrien blinked a few times, “Why can’t you talk to him directly? If he’s the boy-”

“I get choked up on my words when I’m around him, okay? I get so nervous that my words switch around and I end up saying what I’m thinking and it’s just.. So.. so embarrassing. He probably thinks I’m a freak by now.”

“Oh! I get that!” 

“You do?” 

Adrien nodded, “My friend has the same problem, sometimes she can talk to me like normal and other times she gets jumbled up. She always does better when she has something else to focus on. As long as she’s focused on one thing, she can hold a conversation without mixing up her words. It’s kind of interesting. She’s really cool uhm- when she talks to me at least,” he could feel his face going warm and he looked over his shoulder to hide his face. 

“Chat are you blushing?? Oh my gosh! Do you like this girl?”

“She’s just a friend but like a really- pretty friend, but she likes someone else so it’s not really that big of a deal,” he waved his hands dismissively. 

“It figures, I move on from you a little bit, because don’t get it twisted, I am still pawing in love with you every time I see you, but she’s just.. I dunno.”

“A crush?” Ladybug teased. 

“I guess she is a crush, yeah, but again, she likes another boy, not me, and we’re like really good friends. I can’t just walk up to her and be like: “Surprise, after a year of thinking you were just a good friend, I got my shit together and realized that I’ve actually liked you for quite a few months but didn’t have the knowledge to understand that it was love. Let’s go on a date.” “ He made a pointed face. 

Ladybug giggled, “Sometimes.. I feel the same way, honestly. Telling someone you like them is hard, Chat, it always will be.”

“I would like to point out that I’ve been very straight forward about how much I like you.” 

“And I’ve been very straightforward about how much we cannot be together.” 

Adrien grinned, “I know, but when it’s okay to be together, you’ll have the backround knowledge that I like you, which means, I am an option. And that’s good enough for me.” 

“And what about your little crush?”

His face went red again, “Foul card, m’lady, very foul card. What about mystery boy number 2?” 

Ladybug’s face went pink and she laughed, “You play dirty, you know that? Again I.. I don’t know. He’s nice, and supportive, but.. Mystery boy number 1 seems more reachable now. I don’t know what it is, it’s like.. Something’s changed but I can’t place it.” 

“Well, best of luck to both of us and our mystery crushes,” he reached his fist out to her and she knocked hers against his. 

“Pound it,” they said, both grinning to each other. 

“Now let’s actually patrol, kitty.” 

“Yes ma’am,” he jumped to his feet and extended his bo staff, offering his hand to hers, “Want a lift?” 

She rolled her eyes but took it. He wrapped his arm around her waist and together they took off into the night. 

\---

Adrien detransformed and flopped onto his bed, groaning, “Every muscle in my body feels like it’s on fire.” 

“Well maybe if you didn’t show off for Megara and Ladybug you wouldn’t be in so much pain,” Plagg huffed, and Adrien rolled over to pull a piece of camembert out of his drawer for his kwami. 

“I’m only doing what I have to do with Megara, she has a vision and I have to see that vision through, I guess? But I’m not gonna let her down.”

“You can’t let anyone down, can you?”

Adrien looked up at Plagg as he floated around in the dark, bites of cheese disappearing in the shadows. 

“I.. guess not? You went serious all of the sudden.”

“I’m just telling you the truth, Adrien. You’re a huge people pleaser. What are you gonna do when you can’t please everybody?”

Adrien clicked his tongue against his teeth and sighed, shrugging his shoulders, “Why can’t we cross that bridge when we get to it? What put you in such a mood?” 

Plagg sighed, “I dunno, I just… I’m worried about the snap.”

“The what?”

“The snap!” Plagg yelled, “You can only pull yourself so thin before you snap, Adrien, I just..- I worry about when that happens.”

He stared at his Kwami for what felt like an eternity in the dark, pushed up on his hands,

“I’m not going to snap, Plagg. Once the Winter Show is over, everything will be back to how it usually is, I promise. This is just.. A temporary extra thing on my plate, and I enjoy it.” 

“Really?”

“Yes , why do you think I wouldn’t enjoy it?” 

Plagg stared at him and rolled his eyes, “I don’t know. I just worry, and I get to be worried. You’re my boy, y’know. The only boy I’ve ever had.”

“You make it sound like you’re my parent, y’know-”

“Not like that, you know what I mean, ugh,” Plagg rolled his eyes and floated over to Adrien’s shoulder, nuzzling his soft head against his cheek. 

“I know, Plagg, I know,” he gently pressed his cheek against Plagg’s and sighed, staring at the Paris lights through his window.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> BFG Slaughters me with kind comments and it makes the goblin in my brain wanna write nonstop!! the only thing cockblocking me now is work lol <3 but we's gettin close folks.. close 2 da climax.. i feeeeell it.


	6. Idle

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Adrien forgets things Sometimes. It's fine.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> So this is like .5 of my normal chapters bc I realized the other half of this chapter would be a lot better as a standalone chapter heehooo thank u.

Adrien’s back in the sweatshirt, mostly because when he woke up that morning, he felt cold. The type of cold that seeped into his bones and sat there like a rock. The cold that made him feel like a ton of bricks that shouldn’t be moving yet he continued to move, kept pushing himself to go through the motions. 

He didn’t know what was so wrong with that day, he just felt awful. Apparently everyone else could tell, tpo. Nino put his hand on his shoulder during class and asked what was up. Adrien didn’t know what was up, he smiled and said he was just tired. 

Because he certainly felt tired, that was for sure. But he had a nagging feeling in the back of his head, like he was missing something. He didn’t know what it was though, everything was fine. His homework was back on schedule, everything for the winter show was going great. So what was it? Did he forget to do something as Chat Noir? 

“You know, if you worry your lip like that, it’ll end up bleeding, Adrien.”

Alya came into his line of sight and he offered a small smile as she booped his nose. The class was half empty, as they were working on a small project of sorts. Everyone wanted their space, or rather they were forced to have their space. Nino and Marinette were outside in the courtyard. So were Rose and Juleka but that was to be expected. Chloe and Sabine were..elsewhere? 

He focused back on Alya, “I know, I know, got too in my head for a second there,” he ran his fingers through his hair and looked at the work he hadn’t been able to focus on. He couldn’t even remember the topic. 

“You do have a lot on your plate right now, don’t you?”

More than Alya would ever know, but he still nodded. 

“I guess, it’s just.. Intimidating, the Winter Show. A lot of it is very..” how would he put it? He couldn’t exactly say: Oh whoops, my mom is somehow missing and now I’m walking in her place and every fashion critic in the world is going to compare me to her.

Oof, ouch brain, that one made his heart sink down to his stomach. 

He cleared his throat, “It’s personal, for me. If it wasn’t, I would try to get out of it but it’s something I want to do.” And he wanted to do it flawlessly. 

Alya smiled at him in an odd sort of way, nodding. “Yeah- wait, sorry- speaking of personal, can I ask you about Kagami?” 

Adrien’s brows knitted together, “What about Kagami?” 

“You know, you and Kagami, someone mentioned that you two aren’t y’know, an item anymore.”

Well, they hadn’t been an item in quite a few months, honestly. The breakup was mututal, and it was really simple. Kagami thought she loved him but the truth of the matter was that..

“We broke up a few months ago, why.. Why are you asking?” Why did she need to know? It wasn’t his business to tell either. The truth of the matter was that Kagami liked girls, she liked Adrien as a person but she didn’t love him. They were still close, though, nothing would ever change the bond they had. 

Besides, it was a hell of a lot easier to be friends than try to push a relationship. Adrien wasn’t ready, he could joke about it as Chat all day long but being that intimate, sharing personal things with people- it felt unreachable, for him at least. He could hardly do it with friends. 

“I was just wondering! Sorry if I came off harsh.” 

“No, don’t be sorry, I’m just- wondering what you wanted to know, that’s all,” he laughed but it came out nervous even to his ears. He looked down at his work again, clearing his throat. “I’ve been having a weird day, I guess.” 

“Yeah, you came off a little defensive there for a sec,” Alya laughed so Adrien laughed with her, and he shrugged. 

“Kagami and I are still really close friends, I don’t want anyone to think we ended on bad terms, it was a mutual situation for both of us,” he shrugged. “No heatrs broken, it was all fair. People have already tried twisting it though,” mainly Kagami’s mother, but that was personal, and he wouldn’t bring that up with anyone but his father. 

He promised he wouldn’t tell anyone her secret. Adrien was good at secret keeping, at the very least. 

“I think it’s great that you guys are still close! It’s important to maintain a friendship like you two have. Kagami’s a nice girl, y’know.”

He nodded, “She is, and one day she’ll find someone that fits her puzzle piece a lot better than I did.” 

The bell rang and Adrien rose slowly, putting his stuff away into his bag with Alya. 

“Hey, Adrien?”

“Hmm??”

“You know, if you ever need to talk, you can talk to us, right?” 

“Yeah, of course I do,” he smiled and swung his bag over his shoulder, “You guys are my best friends.”

Alya smiled back at him, “I just wanted to remind you, you’re coming over to Marinette’s with us, right?”

“Mari-” His eyes widened. How did he forget to ask? He completely spaced on it, “Oh my god, I forgot that was today,” he could’ve sworn he wrote it down though, he must have. Was it really..

Alya’s brows creased and Adrien ran his fingers through his hair, stopping at his neck and staring down at his work. He hated this part about himself. When he got stressed it was hard for him to pay attention to many things at once. He could only focus on the stress, and that was the Winter Show. 

“I forgot to ask my father, or Nathalie. I have to meet my designer today to try on the mock-up for the show..” His heart dropped down into his stomach. Second time forgetting something about Marinette. How did she not hate him yet? 

“Hey, Hey, it’s totally okay. We know you’re busy, I’ll let her know. Besides, you’ll owe us a huge hangout once this fashion thing is over. You know how you can make it up to her though?”

Alya grinned, Adrien waited. 

“You can get her tickets to the show. She would love it!” 

He could get her tickets.. He could do that, 

“Do you think it would make it up to her?” 

“Think,” Alya scoffed, hand on her hip, “I know it would! Now go get your fashion freak on, you can’t be late.”

Adrien smiled at her, and he felt it that time, felt it reach his eyes and warm his chest, “Thank you.” He bowed his head and walked out of the classroom.


	7. Spring Waltz

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> It takes small things to turn a day around and equally small things to ruin it all over again, right?

The trip to the studio was silent as always. He wondered what Megara had designed for him, this would be the first physical thing he was seeing beyond a pair of shoes. She was an eccentric woman, and he hoped that whatever she created, was fun. 

His father’s designs were always very plain, in nice, minimalist colors, lots of whites with a splash of color in small areas. He knew his dad had an eye for high fashion, but he also seemed to box himself. Adrien wondered if his father had any drawings of something more.. Unique. 

He walked into the studio with his head down but could hear Megara’s gasp from a mile away, 

“Adrien, there you are! Oh my gosh you are going to love this- or I’ll hope you love it, whatever! I think you will,” her pink smile was nice. Megara really suited bright colors. Her lipstick was a nice coral pink, and she wore green shifting shimmer on her eyes. Of course, her eyeliner was next to perfection. 

She had a certain vibe about her, it made her interesting, at least to Adrien. She didn’t give a damn what anyone else thought of her, however her art seemed to be another story. 

And her fashion was her art, it was very poetic. 

Adrien smiled back at her, nodding, “I probably will, did you finish the mock up?”

Megara nodded, curls bouncing all around her head as she took his hands in hers. He noted the rhinestones decorating her fingernails, but just as fast as she took his hands, she reached for his face. 

Soft thumbs brushed under his cheekbones, cradling his face in a firm, unharmful way. Her face went serious, her smile dropping, muscles relaxing and pulling into taut lines that made Megara look much older than she actually was. 

“Do you remember what I told you when we first met?”   
Adrien bit his lip, did he remember what she told him when they first met? “That you.. Wanted to design something groundbreaking, and out there?”

“Well, I did say that. But, I also told you that you have a unique face, remember?”

He nodded, and she smiled. 

“I meant it, and I think I made something that accents your face, especially your eyes. I want you to make this piece come alive, Adrien, I want you to have a say in it. When you put all the pieces of the mock-up, can I trust you to give me your honest opinion?”

Adrien swallowed down the lump that was suddenly in his throat and nodded. 

“Of course I can, it’s your art, after all.”

Megara smiled, and her hands dropped down to squeeze his shoulders, “Great, I’ll go grab everything I have so far!” She darted off behind one of the stools and dug through her bags, pulling out the pair of practice shoes they had been working with, and a garment bag. 

Of course, Adrien could figure out that the mockup was in the garment bag. He took both articles, 

“Do you want me to look at it before I-”

“No! I want you to put it all on and then look in the mirror, in the dressing room, obvs, and then come out here and tell me what you think. But, remember to sell me 6’2 realness, mmkay?”

Adrien nodded and turned on his heel, walking back into the dressing rooms. He was quick to lock the door behind him and lean against it, sighing. 

He dropped his shoulders and rubbed the back of his neck, looking down between the shoes and garment bag. 

What if he looked awful in what he was putting on? What if it didn’t capture Megara’s vision properly? 

He had to swallow down that anxiety. He sucked in a deep breath through his nose and out through his mouth. At the end of the day, it was just clothes.. Just clothes, that was what he told himself. 

They were certainly more than clothes, but thinking they were just clothes made it easier. 

“Adrien-”

“Jesus Christ-! Plagg-” He hadn’t jumped that much in his life. His heart raced in his chest and he fumbled with the bag, barely managing to catch it in his arms. 

“Whoa, whoa! I was just checking on you, sheesh. Someone’s jumpy today.”

Adrien glared at his kwami pointedly, “You could’ve announced your presence a little.. Quieter.” 

“I was just speaking at normal volume, ughhhh, nevermind. You’ve been awfully touchy today. Woke up on the wrong side of the bed?”

Maybe, maybe he did wake up on the wrong side of the bed. He didn’t know, the whole day had simply been exhausting and he could feel his patience started to dwindle, little by little. 

For once, he was thankful that tonight wasn’t his patrol night. He unceremoniously took off his clothes, tossing his sweatshirt and pants onto the ground as quickly as he could. 

“Adrien?”

“Hm?” He unzipped the garment bag, catching flashes of glinting beads and a turtleneck. 

“Can you tell me what’s bothering you so much?” 

Adrien glanced back over at Plagg, who floated in the air a few feet away from him. Concern was written all over his tiny face, so Adrien smiled, 

“Nothing’s bothering me at all, there’s nothing to worry about.” He pulled the shirt out first, holding it out and admiring it. It was a thing of beauty, black and white with triangular blocking. The contrast on the piece itself was gorgeous, and the white parts were beaded and bedazzled with crystals that sparkled gorgeously when they hit the light. The collar itself was solid black, and Adrien knew right away it would contrast greatly against his pale skin, making his eyes pop. 

Megara wasn’t wrong, she was trying to highlight his face with her designs, he hadn’t put it on yet but he could tell what she was going for, or at least see the theme. Balance, it was clearly balance. The black colorblock balanced out the extravagant, beaded white colorblock. 

“Your lies can’t fool me, you know. You do know that we spend nearly every waking and resting moment together, right?” 

“Mhm,” Adrien felt the material, the black part was a knit sweater, and the white part was something akin to silk, maybe satin. This was just the mockup? It already looked excellent. 

“You’re not listening!” 

“I am listening,” he snapped, looking back at the kwami, “I agreed with you, I know I can’t fool you, but I also don’t want to talk about it, not right now.” 

Plagg rolled his eyes and floated closer to him, “I’m just.. What if you get akumatized?”

Adrien laughed, and tried to stifle it in his shoulder, 

“He can try, Plagg, he can try.”

Plagg snickered, “Are you gonna ignore the akuma away?” 

“Can’t akumatize me if I don’t react, can he? Besides, I doubt I’m a target he’d want.”

“Uhm, hello, hormonal teenager, you’re kind of exactly his target here.” 

Adrien shrugged, finally taking the time to actually put the shirt on. He shrugged it over his shoulders and straightened it out over his waist until it sat comfortably against his skin.

Looking into the mirror he could see why it was a mockup. It wasn’t necessarily frumpy so much as there was a little too much fabric where Adrien’s natural waist was. It was made to have a more feminine shape, that much was obvious, the only problem was that Adrien didn’t really.. Have hips to speak of. He was built fairly up and down, a little broader in the chest and shoulders. His waist was probably the most feminine part of his body. He’d let Megara know to try sewing darts into the sides to give him the figure he assumed she wanted to achieve on him. 

It wasn’t bad at all though, and it was comfortable to say the least. Something was familiar about the beading but he couldn’t place it, really. Maybe it was the brand, he was surrounded by this sort of thing all the time. Deja vu was warranted. 

“I don’t think I’m overly emotional though,” Adrien noted, and Plagg rolled his eyes again, sitting on his shoulder. Together they looked in the mirror, two halves of a whole person, technically. 

“More like you stuff your emotions inside yourself like a pillow fit to burst.” 

“Horrible analogy.”

“Fineee,” Plagg whined, “Like a pot left on the stove, you keep adding water thinking it’ll evaporate but you’ll eventually boil over, there. Better analogy?” 

Adrien smiled, and shrugged, “I guess. Okay, pants would probably make this look better, right?”

“Uh, duh.” 

He turned away from the mirror and pulled the pants off of the hanger, and they were well- simple, but sometimes simple was good. The shirt had a lot that was going on anyways. 

He shuffled into the pants and buttoned them. They were precocious little things, triangular, and followed the shirt’s black and white theme. Other than that, the main details were the high waist, and the tapered legs. When he shifted in the light, it seemed like there was something sparkly woven into the fabric because it sparkled marvelously. 

It was.. Fun, actually. So far the entire ensemble was fun, and balanced. Black and White were the simple colors he was used to, but the color block, and the fit, it all worked together nicely. The only thing he needed were the shoes, the stark white platforms. 

“Maybe you should add platforms to your Chat Noir outfit, hmm?” Plagg giggled and Adrien rolled his eyes as he tied up the shoes, flexing his feet and standing back up. 

He didn’t know what it was about platforms but they made his legs look absolute miles long, but maybe it was the pants doing that, the taper adding to the elegance and edge of the whole look. The balance of the colors, the aesthetics. Classy, but edgy in a weirdly comfortable punk way? 

“I mean I quite like them, they make me look great,” he shrugged, turning to the side. Yeah, and by making him look great, he meant that his legs and ass had never looked better. Okay, that was a lie, they looked great as Chat Noir but leather made everyone look great. 

“I’m not saying you look bad, ‘cause you don’t,” Plagg said, and Adrien nodded along with him, “It’s a nice look on you. How come you don’t wear more sweaters? Tis the season.” 

Adrien shrugged at that, he mostly just wore what his father wanted him to wear. “Maybe I will wear more sweaters, I dunno. I have to show Megara, and you need to get back in my bag.”

“Okay, okay, pushy, pushy,” Plagg zipped into his bag and Adrien could spot the glow of his eyes, so he smiled and peace signed at him as he left the room. 

The day was already turning around for the better, he found the beat back in his step as he walked back into the showroom. Megara looked up from her phone and gasped. 

“Oh honey,” she got up from her chair, heels clacking on the floor as she walked up to him. Her hands hovered around his shoulders and she worried her lip. “What do you think?”

“I love the colorblock, the triangle thing is great and different, y’know? The balance aspect of the entire thing is amazing, I can’t believe you mixed knit and satin and made it work. It’s comfortable,” he could feel himself talking faster, heart racing in his chest. He loved the piece, absolutely adored it, he couldn’t help but keep talking,

“The pants make my legs look miles long and I agree, the platforms are an absolutely amazing choice. I love the way everything kind of catches the light, it’s dazzling. And I see that you tried to go for a more feminine cut on the shirt but there’s a little too much fabric in the wrong places, that’s my only critique, really.”

Adrien pinched the excess fabric and Megara nodded along with tears in her eyes and a smile on her face. 

“You made this piece come to life, you know that?” She sniffled and stepped away to wipe at her eyes. She cupped her hands around her mouth and Adrien smiled patiently at her. This meant so much to Megara, he knew that this was a great leap into her project, and her career. Seeing her so happy made his heart buzz with warmth. He was so glad to be apart of this. 

“So you’ve told me, and I’m really glad to be apart of this with you.” 

Megara sniffed again, “It’s not done, but thank you so much. I’ll fix the shirt, and I’ll bring the last piece to this tomorrow, okay? And then, and then we’ll do your makeup, and I’ll fix your hair and it’ll be like a sleepover in the studio, mmkay?” 

Adrien looked at her and stepped forward with open arms. She immediately came into him and they hugged, close and tight, “That sounds wonderful, I can’t wait to see your full piece.” 

“Okay.. okay.. Now go take all that off before I get my mascara all over it. I have so much work left to do it on it,” she sniffled again and stepped back, wiping at her eyes, smearing her running mascara. It gave her a smudgy cat-eye look but it suited her. 

“Of course, I’ll be right back.” He mock bowed and went back to the dressing rooms. He made quick work out of getting changed. Mostly because the dressing room was colder. He was back in his sweatshirt, jeans, and orange shoes faster than anything else. 

Adrien took great care in putting the design back into the garment bag. Plagg zipped onto his shoulder and pressed up against his neck, purring lowly. 

“How’d she like it?”

“I think she cried a little bit,” he didn’t mean to laugh but he did, zipping the bag all the way up again, “I’m just glad that I’m completing her vision,” and doing it perfectly. He felt like he had been so nervous for absolutely no reason at all. His heart still raced though, and he hoped it was from excitement more than anything else. 

He picked up his bag and his phone, checking his messages. Alya had flooded the groupchat with pictures of their hangout. Marinette had been sewing a dress of sorts, white, with a fluffy skirt. He could tell it would be great already, all of Marinette’s designs were great. Rose and Juleka were making funny faces at the camera, or Rose was and Juleka just smiled at her. Even Nino seemed like he was having a great time. 

Guilt sat in his chest like a rock and he typed his message without really thinking, 

Adrien: I’m just about done with the session, if the hangout is still going on, could I come? 

Several people are typing. 

Oh boy. He could feel his heart racing in his chest and he turned his phone over in his hand a few times, and decided to swing his own bag over his shoulder as Plagg crawled inside and zipped it shut. 

He walked out of the dressing room and looked back at his phone. 

Marinette: Sorry! My parents ended it a bit early, but some of us are at a cafe now if you want to come. Here! [Cafe Address] 

Adrien looked down at his phone. He could definitely swing going over to Marinette’s house because her parents owned a bakery, his father had never gotten angry with him for getting food. But could he swing a whole cafe? 

He shook his head and sent his reply. 

Adrien: Ahh, sorry, I should’ve read up ^^’ thank you for the notice and invite. I’ll see if I can go. 

He didn’t think he wanted to go, not honestly. It was the same cafe that she and Luka were at the other night. Wouldn’t that be awkward, or invasive?

Well, it was just a cafe, besides- Marinette didn’t even know he saw, it wouldn’t be fair to just not like a cafe for such a silly reason, or not want to go for said reason.. 

Megara’s heels clacked towards him and he looked up at just the right time. She took the garment bag from his arms, “Okay so! This cafe is doing a cool happy hour right now, you know, this cafe,” she showed him a picture on her phone and it was just his luck that it was the cafe he was trying to avoid. 

That was too much of a coincidence. He smiled a little, “Uhm.. I didn’t know they had a happy hour.”

“Yeah, I know, it’s super cool, but I want both of us to go. It’ll be a bonding experience. I already called your father and he said it was fine since we areee supposed to get to know each other,” Megara winked and Adrien felt his jaw drop.

She called him that quickly? And easily? She didn’t even go to Nathalie first.. Well. Megara had a bravery that Adrien felt like would never ever be his own. 

“Don’t look so stressed, I know how to drive.”

“I wasn’t worried about that, I just.. You called my father?”

“Uhm, duh, who else would I call?”

Right, right, normal people just called their parents, they didn’t have to schedule an appointment. He exhaled slowly to calm down his nerves, 

“Sounds great, I can pay, by the way,” he gestured to his bag and Megara gasped dramatically. 

“Nope! I’m the adult, I’m paying. Besides, it’s buy one get one, I’ll just buy my own drink and make you drink the exact same thing. Be prepared, Adrien,” she winked playfully and Adrien couldn’t help but snort out a laugh. 

“It sounds like fun, I just don’t drink a lot of coffee,” 

Megara started leading him out to her car, hips swaying as she talked. Her hand bounced up and down in the air too, even if he couldn’t hear her, he was positive he could figure out what she was saying simply by her hand gestures alone.

“Well, it’s about time you start! You’re coming of age Adrien, now it’s time to drink the bean water!” 

Adrien snorted again and hid his mouth behind his hand. Outside, the sun was just starting to set and Paris glowed in a gorgeous, golden hue. 

Megara pranced over to a red sedan and beeped the unlock button a few times. Her trunk popped open and she laid down the garment bag carefully. 

“Meet Esmerelda, my beautiful baby.” 

“You named your car?”

“Doesn’t everybody?” 

Adrien shrugged. He’d never heard of a car having names but it seemed very Megara to him. She gestured to the passengers side door and told him to get in, so he did. 

In a few short minutes they were buckled in and off, soaring down the less crowded streets with ease. Megara rolled her windows down and the wind whipped at Adrien’s face and hair while Megara’s simply rolled with the wind. Her smile was unbeatable, a large pair of sunglasses balanced on the bridge of her nose. 

The guilt still sat in him, but at least for now, he could ignore it, and focus on the beauty of those around him.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> So this chapter got long. my BAD but I had a good time with it. Thank u guys so much for u r kind comments. They really help inspire me to put my all in this!!


	8. Ribs

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Akumas and Hawkmoth.. Fucking Hawkmoth. Adrien just wanted to introduce his friends to his designer, how could it have gone so badly?

Adrien sent a text into the groupchat, letting them know that he was coming to the cafe but he was coming with his designer. Everyone seemed beyond excited, but he still felt weird about it.  
  
“My friends are actually at the cafe now,” he told Megara, making sure to look anywhere but her face. “Probably for the same deal.”  
  
Megara gasped, “Oh my god, I get to meet your little school friends? Is that what being a big sister feels like? Do I get to embarrass you a little?” She started laughing, and Adrien felt the tenseness in his shoulders finally drop.   
  
For a moment he was afraid that Megara would be angry with him, he didn’t know why but he thought it would upset her that they would be there. Logically, there would be no reason for her to be upset.   
  
His heart simply raced in his chest and he leaned back against the car seat, releasing the breath he didn’t realize he was holding until he laughed.   
  
“I mean, I know they’d be excited to meet you. I have a friend that’s really into fashion design, you’ll probably uhm.. Get along.”  
  
Megara snorted out a laugh, “I can’t wait to meet her, oh my god, does she have her own designs?”  
  


Adrien nodded, “Yeah! She draws her own stuff all the time, I know she’s made hats and scarves before, and sweaters- oh, and jewelry. She’s made really nice jewelry before,” he ran his fingers over the top of his miraculous and smiled.   
  
“Now I have to meet this girl. Maybe one day she’ll be the next me! Participating in some fancy show, contest, thingy- AHA we’re here!” Megara turned sharply into the parking lot and Adrien had to brace himself against the window.   
  
Megara parked as quickly as she could, making sure she was between the lines. “I’m so excited oh my gosh, you have to rate my drink, okay?”  
  
Adrien nodded. He didn’t think he’d do a good job rating it because he honestly had never had a lot of coffee in his entire life to tell what was good and what was bad. He unbuckled and got out, shielding his eyes from the sun.   
  
He heard the car lock as he walked towards the entrance. And that’s when he felt it, a pinch like sensation in the middle of his back. He stopped and tried to rub at the spot but the second he twisted his arms around him, Megara had her arm over his shoulders and she laughed.   
  
“Gosh, the sun somehow gets brighter at night time the colder it gets, I swear.”  
  
Megara must’ve pinched him as a joke, so he laughed it off with her. They walked into the cafe side by side and she brushed her knuckles against his cheek before pulling away to look at the menu. Adrien looked too but all of it was lost to him beyond a latte and mocha. His father was a fan of plain lattes, he knew that much.   
  
He looked around the cafe, seeing if he could spot any of his friends but he couldn’t tell where they were, at least not until he heard Marinette’s bell-like twinkle of a laugh from behind a wall and he felt his cheeks go warm. So she was here then, they all were, and he was waiting in line with Megara, who had her sunglasses perched on her forehead as she stared longingly at the menu.   
  
“So, when we get our drinks,” Adrien started slowly, “Can I introduce you to my friends?”  
  
“Oh! Totally, a hundred percent, I wanna meet the youth, see what they’re into.”   
  
“You’re still a youth too, y’know-”   
  
Megara laughed, her head falling back, and she snorted, “You flatter me, Adrien, you really do.” Her hand dropped into his hair and she tousled it like he was a toddler, and then she pulled him closer and popped her chin onto the top of his head.   
  
“You see the menu?”  
  
Adrien felt cramped, and crowded, having to bend his knees to keep Megara comfortable in the position he was currently stuck in, “Uhh, yeah.”   
  
“Wanna know my favorite drink?”   
  
“I’m dyin’ to know,” he laughed and looked at the menu, there were little drawings of coffee cups and smiling faces. It was all very adorable, he could see why Marinette, and Luka, would like this place.   
  
And thinking about that made his heart sink again but he tried not to show it, keeping a vague smile on his face as Megara hummed. 

  
“It’s an iced caramel macchiato with an extra shot of espresso, and extra caramel drizzle around the cup, large of course.”   
  
“Sounds very.. Sweet?”  
  
“Oh totally, I love it! Still packs that coffee punch but with other complementary flavors it’s just, muah~” She kissed the air and finally let Adrien go.  
  
He rose back to his full height and rubbed his neck. Megara wiped her hands on his clothes, “Jesus, how much gel is in your hair?”  
  
Adrien shrugged plainly, “A lot, my hair can be difficult to manage,” but he made it look effortless. With the right products it could be mostly effortless, but making it look nice and effortless was difficult. He’d always had particularly weird hair, it was full and voluminous but didn’t like to be tamed whatsoever. So he’d spend about a half hour in the mornings straightening it, and then styling it. Luckily for him, he only needed to wear it the same every day.   
  
Even if he wore hoodies to school, he’d always do his hair in the mornings-   
  
“So, have you ever worn it without products?”  
  
“Uh.. no, not really? Appearances are important, if I wore it unstyled, I’d look like a mess,” he knew he would. But when he met Megara’s gaze, she simply had her lips pursed like she was trying to picture how he would look with his natural hair.   
  
So Adrien looked at her and she shrugged, “Makes sense, but I think you should either come to one of our little fun meetings with your hair unstyled, or wash the gel out of your hair first thing. I want to experiment with accessories, hair, and makeup next! Ugh, I would love to fluff up your hair, make it look like candy floss.” She gestured around his head.   
  
“I’ll make a note of that,” The line moved forward and he felt himself start to clench his fists again but he didn’t stop it. Instead he looked around the cafe again. It was decorated very cutely, like it was designed to have pictures taken inside of it. Everyone seemed engrossed in their drinks or their conversations. Everything about the environment was warm but..   
  
He still felt like he was on edge, and he didn’t know why. He looked over and Megara was talking to the cashier, smiling. Maybe the cashier was laughing at a joke but Adrien wouldn’t know. It was like he was underwater and he couldn’t quite hear anything. It was a familiar feeling, but not the one he had felt in quite som etime. Adrien was present but also far, far away from whatever was going on around him. 

And then he started to walk without thinking, past the counter. Someone had touched his shoulder but he kept going, passing a condiment bar, several tables. There was a back exit, he knew there was a back exit because it had been where Luka and Marinette were that night, the back patio, outdoor seating.   
  
He didn’t make it very far before Marinette was in his field of vision, and she was saying something he couldn’t hear. Her eyes were glossy with worry and he could feel himself start to smile, clasping his hands close to his chest. His heels lifted off the ground and touched back down, and that time he heard himself,   
  
He had giggled, high and airy, “I’m so okay, don’t worry~” he could hear the jingle in his voice, the glee, but he felt none of it. His heart felt like a gaping hole, his stomach a pit. When he glanced at his clasped fingers he could see rivulets of blood seeping between his knuckles, cascading down the back of his hands.   
  
And he remembered how worried Marinette had been the day he came to school with his scabby palms, and the guilt started to grow again, but his smile wouldn’t leave his face. Why wouldn’t it leave? He stared down at his hands until they became two pairs, and his center of balance was completely thrown off.   
  
The world went black.  
  
***  
  


Adrien felt like he was swallowing a wad of cotton when he woke up the first time. He lifted his head off of something and felt someone’s cool hand caressing his head, laying him back down. Fingers carded through his hair, and in the distance he felt like he could hear humming.   
  
When he managed to crack his eyes open, the cafe looked mostly empty, chairs were on the ground and in his line of sight he could see several broken glasses. It was like a bull had run through the place.   
  
He could also see other people on the ground, unconscious. Some part of his mind supplied the information that he was just one of those people, the only difference was that someone stayed with him for some reason.   
  
“It’s okay, Adrien, go back to sleep,” the voice is gentle, and soothing, like fog over an ocean.   
  
Adrien turns over slowly and the hands move from the back of his head to his forehead as he opens his eyes again. He stared up at blue eyes and his vision doubled again as he spoke,   
  
“Luka?”   
  
“It’s me.”   
  
Adrien hummed in the back of his throat, nodding. Luka’s fingers pushed his hair out of his face.   
  


“What happened?”   
  
“There’s an akuma, Ladybug’s handling it right now. You need to stay down for right now, okay? It’s powers are affecting you and a little over half the city. I’ll be with you the whole time.”  
  
“Have I.. been attacking people?”  
  
Luka shook his head, and Adrien sighed in relief. That was good, at least he wasn’t attacking people.   
  
Wait.. Ladybug.   
  


Oh god, she was out there by herself and her partner was currently barely conscious, under the effects of the akuma she was trying to fight. He tried to sit up but a hand stopped him, a hand, and the spots in his vision.   
  
“It’s okay, Adrien, it’s okay…”  
  
Luka’s voice grew more distant and Adrien’s eyelids felt like lead as he closed them again.   
  
***  
  
The second time Adrien woke up, he was in his bed. There was no light coming in through his windows and he had to guess it was nighttime. Somehow, between going to the cafe and getting to his room, he had lost several hours of time, and gained a killer headache.   
  
He patted the area around his bed until he found his phone, plugged in. Did he plug it in? He couldn’t remember. He took it off the charger and rolled over, pulling his blanket over his shoulder along with him.   
  
He had to squint against his screen brightness, and turning it down didn’t help either. He had missed a flood of messages in the groupchat. Not like that was abnormal though.  
  
It was about eight o’clock at night and he typed a very quick message,   
  
**Adrien: **hey guys ^^’ I’m sorry about the cafe incident.   
  
He was sorry, he really wanted to spend time with them, and introduce them to Megara. Fucking Hawkmoth, fucking Akuma. He rolled his eyes at the thought. He couldn’t even fight the akuma as Chat because he had been incapacitated as himself. All of Paris had to have an opinion on _that, _at least. He didn’t want to try logging into the Ladyblog.   
  
**Nino: **bro, don’t be sorry. It was hawkmoths fault, dude has to crash everything.   
  
**Alya: **Yeah, don’t be sorry! You didn’t know there was going to be an akuma attack. Are you feeling alright?   
  
**Adrien:** Uhm, I think I’m alright? I dunno, I can’t remember much of what happened between falling out and getting back home. Luka was watching me, I think?   
  
**Alya:** if you want I can fill you in tomorrow at school? It was kind of a lot.   
  
**Adrien: **I didn’t hurt anyone, did I?  
  
**Nino: **no! You just started talking weird and then you passed out like everyone else. The akuma had a mad weird idea, what did it call itself..   
  
**Alya: **Ugh it called itself the Midnight Jester, it was so freakin’ corny..but Adrien, you didn’t attack anyone. You just got kinda giggly and your eyes were pink, and then you fell out. I promise you didn’t do anything bad.  
  
Adrien felt relieved to hear confirmation that he hadn’t hurt people again. Hearing it from his friends meant a lot, it meant he really didn’t hurt someone. He shifted against his mattress and cleared his throat.   
  
**Adrien: **Did I at least look good with pink eyes?   
  
**Luka: **It was definitely interesting looking. Major floral vibes.   
  
**Nino: **i mean i thought it was pretty cool looking, but it was so fast you just kinda smiled, said you were okay and then bam, you were on the floor and marinette was telling luka to watch you.   
  
Oh yeah, Marinette was there. He nearly forgot, god- he must’ve scared the crap out of her.   
  
**Adrien: ** I’m sorry if I scared anyone. It’s weird, I’ve never felt the effects of an akuma so directly like that. The last time it was when I got turned into a sparkly gold statue..and that was weird too. I dunno. Thanks for watching me Luka! I’ll see you guys tomorrow :)   
  


**Nino: ** goodnight adri-bro!!    


**Alya: **gn!   
  
**Marinette: **Make sure you rest well :D!!!   
  
He smiled at Marinette’s message, turning his phone off and setting it face down on his pillow.   
  
Plagg zoomed up and perched on his nightstand.   
  


“You’re alright, right?”   
  
Adrien nodded at his Kwami, “I’m alright, Plagg, I’m just… tired That akuma really knocked me on my ass..”   
  
“You should get some sleep.”  
  
“I do plan on that you know?” He laughed and curled up more, his knees drawing closer to his chest. “Goodnight, Plagg.”   
  
“Goodnight, Adrien.”  
  


**Notes for the Chapter:**

> i wanted 2 say thank u guys so much for over 1k hits and 20 bookmarks. it means a lot 2 me that u guys keep up with my silly ltitle fic ;3; 
> 
> Also. this chapter in my opinion is.. lowkey boring, sO THANK u for getting to the end. it's the last chapter before the 'hard' stuff hits which might take me a while to write. !! if u wanna keep up with me or ask any questions i do have a ML focused tumblr blog called: chattonlait ! 
> 
> thank u so muhc for reading, i'll see u guys in da next one!


	9. Coffin

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Adrien has an interesting chat with Hawkmoth, and a bonding moment with Marinette. Sometimes black cats bring good luck.

First thing in the morning, and Adrien was starting an early patrol. Not because he wanted to, because believe him, he’d rather be in bed. He was still exhausted from the night before. He hadn’t realized how much and akuma attack could take out of him when he wasn’t wearing his miraculous. He wasn’t even attacked so much as.. Effected by it. He wished he could remember what happened but he honestly couldn’t.   
  
He just fell out, woke up in Luka’s lap, fell back asleep, or passed out again. It was one or the other. But hearing that his eyes went pink, and he had talked funny? That was.. Embarrassing, mostly. He wished he could remember what he said to Marinette.. He needed to apologize for that, for scaring her.   
  
He decided he would do that once he got to school, for now he had to soar across the Paris skies, hopping from rooftop to rooftop. Normally he would never even try to patrol in the mornings, but he missed the akuma yesterday.   
  
Adrien perched on the edge of a stone rooftop, knees to his chest as he took his baton out, and he was right- he really missed the akuma yesterday, and several voicemails from Ladybug. His thumb hovered over the play button before he shook his head. He knew he should’ve been more aware, should’ve been there for his lady.   
  


So instead, he took a chance, and he called her instead. He held the baton closer to his ear as it rang. If she wasn’t in costume it’d go straight to voicemail, but it rang. She was also out before the sun rose. His heart blossomed with warmth as he stared down at the streets below him.   
  
The line clicked, and Adrien started speaking when he heard Ladybug inhale,   
  
“I know I wasn’t there to fight the akuma yesterday, and I’m sorry,” he said, licking his bottom lip as he stood up, pacing the edge of the roof. “It was like with Style Queen, this akuma got to me before I realized it was even there, I can’t even-” he huffed, “I can’t even remember when it _got _me in the first place. But I’m sorry.”   
  
He took a deep breath in, “I should’ve been there to help you defeat it.. Forgive me, m’lady.”   
  
“Are you okay?”  
  


He flinched at Ladybug’s question. She shouldn’t be asking if he was okay, she should’ve been angry, he wasn’t there and he was her partner for crying out loud.  
  
“I’m fine,” he said through tight lips. He wasn’t fine and he knew that, he was still tired, his friends were starting to catch on, and this akuma.. Was the straw on the camel’s back. He didn’t _know_ if he could keep going the way he was, pretending like everything was perfect and fine all the time. It wasn’t fine, he wasn’t fine.   
  
He heard Ladybug hum tentatively into the speaker, “Chatton.”   
  


“Yes?”   
  
“You sound like you’re scared.”   
  
“I’m not,” he lied again. But it wasn’t a full lie. He was anxious, not scared. All he had to do was make it to the winter show.. That was next week, once next week was over, he could breathe again, he promised himself. He could go back to normal, he wouldn’t have to think about the fact that he was taking his mother’s place. Everyone would be watching, judging, critics would look at him and judge him, and subsequently his father, twice as hard.   
  
“It’s okay if the akuma scared you, Chat, you didn’t have any defense, but I’m not angry that you weren’t there, okay? I had to call in Rena and Carapace, but it’s what I recruited them for, so that we can have help. If you were alone, I would expect you to try and do the same.”   
  
He didn’t remind Ladybug that he didn’t have access to the other miraculouses (miraculi? whatever.) Instead he nodded, even though Ladybug couldn’t see it. The chilly winter wind ruffled his hair and he sighed into the baton.   
  
“Thank you Ladybug, this conversation.. I really needed it,” he smiled to himself and waved to some kids as he jumped onto another rooftop, pacing quietly. “I think it might snow today.”  
  
Ladybug’s laugh twinkled in his ear and he felt his face go warm, smile now absolutely fixed to his face. He was still in love- but it felt wrong, how could he love Ladybug and Marinette? His heart felt warm for both of them, sometimes so much so that it felt constricting. Ladybug was his best friend though, she knew him but didn’t at the same time.   
  
He could open up to Ladybug about things that he felt like he could never tell Marinette. She seemed to have this.. Idea of who he was in her head, but didn’t really know _him. _  
  
But then again, no one did. And that was his own fault, a product of his own.. Issues.   
  
“I’m glad that you felt comfortable enough to have it with me, Chat. I have to get going now, but don’t ever be afraid to leave me a message, okay?”  
  
“M-mhm,” he stuttered into the phone and sighed, “Cold, sorry. I’ll catch you around, Bugaboo.”   
  
“Bye-bye!”   
  
“Bye,” he clicked the end call button and looked down at his weapon as the screen blacked out. He should’ve probably stopped pacing like a manic cat on a roof. So he did. He jumped down and landed in a long deserted alley-way, destranforming seamlessly.   
  
He was still in his morning workout clothes, he had blatantly lied to Nathalie and told him he needed to go for a jog. It was a half truth, but he said he needed the air, space to breathe after having something so invasive happen.   
  
Adrien shivered, he could barely remember what happened when the akuma effected him but it still felt like a snake was crawling up his spine whenever he tried to remember. Like something happened and his brain was blocking out the memory to protect him. He felt, in a lack of other words, completely violated.   
  


And then he wondered what it would be like to actually be akumatized, he never talked to his friends about that, it always felt too personal to bring up. But now he wondered how they felt, did they feel violated, disgusted? Being akumatized was literally a punishment for having negative emotions. Hawkmoth used a literal _baby_ as one of his weapons before.   
  
How could anyone move past that without thinking about it? Akumatized victims couldn’t remember what they did while akumatized but the news had no problem broadcasting it for the entire world to see. The entire world watched children become possessed by evil, while the children themselves couldn’t remember what they did in the first place.   
  


His hatred for Hawkmoth grew in that moment, doubling in size like a weight in his chest. He, and Ladybug, needed to get his miraculous, they needed to do it quickly, it was only a matter of time before Hawkmoth became stronger, or gained followers.  
  
Lila Rossi popped in his mind only for a brief second as he turned a corner. She would probably follow Hawkmoth if anything to cause chaos, she was already a liar, a good one too. He still hadn’t been able to catch her in her lies but he knew he’d get there, eventually. Adrien learned over time and example that everyone showed their true colors, eventually, and one day Lila would slip up. He still kept evidence of her lies, recordings expertly hidden on his phone, labeled, they would be color coded if he could.   
  
God, he was a lunatic, wasn’t he? Oh well, nobody had to know that he detested Lila Rossi just about as much as Marinette did. Probably for the same reason, but it wasn’t something he talked about. He had to keep face, pretend like he tolerated Lila at the bare minimum.   
  
He needed to stop thinking about her, he could start feeling his own anger build in his chest and he didn’t need to be that wound up so early in the morning. He was supposed to be jogging to work out his stress, not build it up with stupid thoughts.   
  
Adrien pulled his phone out and stared at the clock. He’d been out for three hours, it was nine in the morning, he was late for school. Did he even want to go? Honestly, no, he didn’t. He still felt.. Ashamed of himself, and he knew why but at the same time he didn’t understand it. None of his friends were angry at him, they were just concerned.   
  


But he still had the impending feeling that they were secretly mad, he couldn’t help but think that way. He was spending less and less time with them lately, and he wasn’t sure…   
  
He just wasn’t sure. He shook his head, clearing out the notifications from the group text. Maybe he should mute it for the time being?.. Maybe.. That would be best?   
  
Adrien unlocked his phone and opened the groupchat, trying to ignore the messages as best he could and that was when he heard it-   
  
Moth wings. He didn’t have much time to react, a black moth settled into the screen of his phone while his thumb hovered over the notification settings.   
  
_“Always afraid of rejection, aren’t you Adrien?” _  
  
He braced himself, clenching his fingers around his device. This wasn’t happening, not right now. It couldn’t be- it couldn’t be. He clenched his jaw tightly, closing his eyes. 

This was his chance, he could actually hear Hawkmoth in his head, clearly.   
  
_“Adrien Agreste, I am Hawkmoth-” __  
__  
_ No, he knew that voice, he can hear the light, condescending tone, the rich smoothness that occured when not clipped off into brief sentences. He’d heard that exact tone before, if only a few times in his life. Never was it directed at him. It was so familiar but at the same time, he couldn’t place it..  
  
_“I will give you this power in exchange for the Ladybug and Chat Noir miraculous-” __  
  
_

Adrien felt like his teeth were about to grind to powder. He didn’t have time to be akumatized, he really, really didn’t. He tilted his chin up, staring directly at nothing, literally nothing. The world around him was black and glowing purple closer to his eyes.   
  
“Go to hell.”   
  


_ “Excuse me?” _   
  


“Is this some sort of power trip? Does it make you feel in control to have power over teenagers, to use and abuse their emotions to your own gain? Does it make you feel good, Hawkmoth?”    
  


_“You have no right to speak to me like this-” __  
__  
_ “You’re the one who came to me to get the Ladybug and Chat Noir miraculous, right? I think I’m in every right to speak to you however I decide to,” he could feel his heart racing in his chest as he spoke, and it was like the emotional dam he kept all of his thoughts behind was finally starting to break and fall apart, flooding him. His heart raced and his skin felt like it was on fire.   
  
Adrien had Hawkmoth trapped, he was resisting the akuma, there was no out. Not until he either accepted the akuma and Hawkmoth’s power, or if he threw his phone. Hawkmoth couldn’t back away.   
  
He felt himself smile as he talked, “Awe, silence, that’s cute. Aren’t you supposed to be a supervillain? Being shocked into silence by a 15 year old seems kind of beneath you, and horribly underwhelming at that.”   
  


He could remember when his father commented that Adrien, like his mother, was incredibly dramatic. He would lay it on thick, just to have fun with it, or because he could tell he was making Hawkmoth uncomfortable. They were playing a game of cat and mouse.   
  
Somewhere in the back of his head, he remembered that cats could and would eat insects, it was quite literally a predator and prey scenario. Hawkmoth was ensnared in his trap, and like a good kitty, Adrien was going to play with him until he died.   
  


_ “Is power not good enough for you? I am offering you immense-”  _ _   
  
_

“Save it, I don’t need your power to get what I want,” he was still his  _ father’s  _ son. He was equally as good at getting into people’s heads. He learned from the best. “I really am just curious you know, about why you want their miraculous so badly. Is it to thwart them? What’s your prerogative?” 

_ “You don’t need to know what I need beyond the miraculous!” _

  
Adrien swore he heard Hawkmoth’s breath catch in the back of his throat, and he narrowed his own gaze. Some part of him wondered if anyone was watching, it was probably a spectacle. Model Adrien, arguing while Hawkmoth tried to akumatize him. 

He tasted blood in his mouth, and his head started throbbing.   
  
“I.. I don’t have time for this, I don’t have time to terrorize Paris to get you some jewels,” he could tell his voice was starting to shake, but he couldn’t break down. He clenched his phone in his hand and he felt the screen start to split and splinter between his fingers.   
  
_“Now isn’t that peculiar, no time?” __  
__  
_ He slipped up, he could feel it. He closed his eyes. He couldn’t lose his resolve, he needed to spin the control back in his favor,  
  
“I can strike you a deal, Hawkmoth. Give me a week and two days, keep the akuma in my phone, and I’ll give myself to you, no holds barred.”   
  
Adrien heard him breathe, probably considering the offer. He squeezed his phone even harder,   
  
“I have a box in my backpack that I can keep it in, just find a way to get in contact with me after that amount of time passes.”  
  
_“And if I reject your offer?”_   
  
Adrien scoffed, and rolled his eyes, whispering, “Then it’s your loss and you’ve just wasted your time arguing with a fifteen year old,” he’d break his phone, throw it, and set the akuma free. It’d go to someone else, he’s sure, or it wouldn’t. Suddenly he wasn’t positive, it was getting harder and harder to think.   
  
He straightened out his shoulders, exhaling slowly,  
  
“So. Deal or no deal? I don’t have all day.”   
  
Hawkmoth hummed in his ear, _“I believe we have a deal, Adrien. But please be aware that all of your negative emotions will go into the akuma in your device. When you accept it, it’ll be much stronger than it is now. Are you prepared for that challenge?” __  
__  
_ Was he? This was his one connection to Hawkmoth, if he could get Hawkmoth to trust him, he could learn the truth about his identity, he could uncover him. It wasn’t the best way, or the most direct, but it was what he had.   
  
“I am, we’ll be in touch.”

  
And he dropped his phone. The world spun around him and his knees trembled as he crouched down on the concrete. His whole body shook and he took deep, gasping breaths. He felt like he just ran a marathon, everything ached.   
  
His phone was a shattered black brick, and he yanked his bag off his shoulder, thankful he actually brought it with him when he went out for his jog. Never had he opened something up so fast in his life but in seconds he had his phone in a little cardboard box, and he zipped it away in one of the many pockets inside.   
  
He felt like he was actively putting the nails in his own coffin as he shut his bag. His heart raced like crazy in his chest. But there was a weight on his shoulder, a small one. One that snuggled into his neck and whispered words that he couldn’t quite hear.   
  
So he closed his eyes, holding his bag close to him, guarding his latest secret. He counted to ten, and when he opened his eyes he realized he had been totally alone the whole time, hidden away in an alley. He must’ve been walking while talking to Hawkmoth, trying to get away, he must’ve been.   
  
Adrien sighed in relief and looked down at his kwami, “I don’t think Ladybug’s gonna be proud of this one,” his voice was raspy.   
  
“But it’s the closest thing we have to Hawkmoth, right?” Plagg said, nuzzling closer.   
  
“I have to explain it to her on our next patrol.. This secret, I can’t keep this to myself. Too many people could get hurt,” his friends would hate him if they knew what he was harboring. He willfully struck a deal with Hawkmoth, who the hell did that?  
  
Apparently Adrien Agreste did that. He felt Plagg pop back into his bag and at first he thought it was because of a person, but when he looked up, he was simply greeted with a little black cat standing in front of him.   
  
It was painfully ironic, but Adrien stuck his hand out, slowly, barely extending his fingers towards it,   
  
“Alone out here too?” He mused to the cat. All the cat did was meow at him and sniff his hand, rubbing it’s head against him. He scratched behind it’s ears and it wandered closer to him. Eventually the cat situated itself in his lap, purring contently in his hands.   
  
“Adrien, shouldn’t you be in class?”  
  
Adrien jumped out of his skin, flattening his back against the wall as he caught the cat, making sure to stroke it gently.   
  
“Jesus Christ,” he put a hand against his heart, looking up at his latest assailant and to his shock it was.. Marinette.

“.. Shouldn’t you be in class too?” She was still in her pajamas, not that he was much better off. He was in a lavender sweatshirt and leggings, not exactly the most put together look. Hell, he didn’t wear purple.. Ever, unless it was an accent color. And his hair wasn’t done and he didn’t have time to do his morning skincare.   
  
But Marinette turned pink and she laughed, rubbing the back of her neck, “Y-yeah, I should be, I just uhm, was catching up on homework and I saw one of those black butterflies come by and I got worried so I tried following it but then I got lost, it’s a mess. I was gonna try and get something for the Ladyblog as a present for Alya but well, lost it.”   
  
Adrien couldn’t help it, he smiled sympathetically, “I was just out for a jog, got too caught up in my thoughts and I ended up here,” he shrugged while he talked, easily making up a lie. Not that it was a full one, he did end up there because he was talking to Hawkmoth, in his head, because if it was out loud than he was positive someone else would’ve seen him. He cleared his throat,   
  
“But look, when I realized I was lost, this cool cat sauntered over, look at how pretty uh..” he checked it’s underside as cooly as he could, “She is?”   
  
Marinette gasped and crouched down with him, “Oh, she’s gorgeous, probably a stray, oh.. People always say black cats are bad luck.”  
  
_Yeah, tell me about it._ He tried not to roll his eyes but he nodded, “It keeps them from getting adopted, I read an article about it.”  
  
Marinette worried her lip and Adrien just watched her. Her hair was a little messy, and she certainly wasn’t dressed for the weather.   
  
It was only natural for him to take off his sweater and hand it to her, pulling the cat closer to him. He was wearing a tank-top beneath it, and her eyes widened as he passed it over.   
  
“It’s gonna snow today. Here, take this, and I’ll walk you home so you can get dressed.”  
  
“You, you don’t have to do that,” she stuttered and waved her hands.  
  
Adrien smiled, “No, I insist. I’ve been.. Really busy lately and I feel bad for not being able to spend time together. Besides, it’s cold. You’ll get sick walking around in pajamas. Please, I have an extra one at school.”   
  
Marinette looked hesitant, but Adrien pushed a little harder. She nodded and finally took it, pulling it over her head. It was probably two sizes too big and she looked.. Really pretty in purple. He felt his cheeks heat up and he couldn’t keep his own smile off his face.   
  
“Where are you going to keep the cat?”  
  
Adrien stopped, and he looked back down at the cat, who only mewed at him and pawed back at him for his hands. He ran his fingers through her fur again and shrugged, “I can probably keep her at my place.”  
  
“Will your father let you?”  
  
“Oh, absolutely not, so I won’t tell him,” he answered easily with a shrug, and then a smile, “I’ll make sure she finds a good home, I promise. We should get going, we don’t wanna be too late, right?”  
  
Marinette smiled, and held her hand out. For a moment, Adrien didn’t know what to do. He stared at her open palm and looked back down at the cat. He managed to shift the feline comfortably into one arm and he let Marinette pull him up.   
  
She was strong, and he was positively red in the face.   
  
“Besides, we can get breakfast at the bakery before we go, oh, and my dad can probably lend you a jacket!” She talked as she walked and Adrien followed. He didn’t think she ever had this much confidence before but it made him feel proud, she wasn’t stuttering around him anymore.   
  
Did she not hate him? Was he finally able to correct whatever he did wrong? A warm feeling bloomed in his chest and he nodded.   
  
“That sounds nice, thank you.”  
  
She turned over her shoulder and she grinned at him, and all at once he felt free.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> hey howdy hey, so !! I changed my username and profile pic 2 better suit my current fav fandom LOLOLOL. my new username matches my fandom blog @chattonlait.tumblr.com if u wanna check meow (hah pun) out.
> 
> Anyways. when i was writing this i thought i'd deadass end it with the winter show but now i'm like continueing to write it and I DONT think that's a good ending point (I was gonna make two whole fics and link them together) but now I think I'm just going to write one.. large fic. hooo...
> 
> Thank you sm!! for reading my passion project!!! I really appreciate all of ur comments and <3 ah. love u guys. MUAH see u in the next chapter.


	10. Bad Dog

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> It's the day of the show, Adrien's kind of a nervous wreck, but tears are like. Totally vogue, right?

The days leading up to the Winter Show were uneventful. Adrien felt horrible, he had to leave the cat at Marinette’s because he couldn’t find the time to ask his father about a pet. He hardly saw him anymore but it made sense. A fashion event was coming up, of course his father would be sparse.

It still sucked, and Adrien remained fairly isolated from his friends. All he could focus on was the show, school, being Chat Noir, and that was on a wash, rinse and repeat cycle the entire week. He didn’t mean to purposefully ignore them, he was just.. Scared. What if they found out about his akumatized phone? How could he justify that? 

The truth was, he couldn’t, and he could barely justify it to himself. It kept him awake at night, knowing that he struck a deal with Hawkmoth. He was putting Ladybug in active danger and he was supposed to protect her! 

But there was no escaping it, not really. He was going to figure it out on his own.

Which was why he told Plagg he wasn’t going to wear his miraculous the day of the show. 

“Hello? You said you were going to do it in a week and two days!” 

“I know, I know- I just.. I don’t think I can wait two more days.”

“That excited to be akumatized?” 

“No!” And Adrien wanted to rip his hair out in that moment, arguing with his Kwami, “He said it would get stronger and this show it’s- a lot for me, emotionally. I can’t give this bug more drive than it already has against me, I can’t put Paris in that much danger, okay? And if I’m akumatized, and I’m wearing the ring I could just- pawn it back off onto Hawkmoth. If I hide it, it’ll be easier, safer, okay?”

Plagg seemed to take him seriously, actually. It was a weird feeling, watching his kwami nod solemnly at the realization that if Adrien was wearing the ring, and he was akumatized, he’d probably hand it off to Hawkmoth against his will. 

“I don’t want to lose you, Plagg.”

“And I don’t wanna lose you, kid. Do what you think is best, I’ll be here for you.”

Plagg zoomed over and pressed his head against Adrien’s cheek and Adrien cupped him gently in his hands, rubbing his face against his.   
\---

It was the day of the show, and Adrien was leaving school early for the preparations. Part of him wanted to, very badly. He wanted to bite the bullet and get it over with, but his studies were still important.

He patiently sat next to Ivan Bruel, trying to help him understand the math they’ve been working on lately. Madame Bustier had given them the hour to help each other, and Adrien didn’t mind. Math was more his forte anyways, and he walked Ivan through all the steps. 

He kept an eye on his watch, his ring finger feeling absolutely bare, and he kept an eye on Ivan while he worked. Sometimes he’d gently correct him, remind him to take it one step at a time. 

“It’ll get easier, I promise. I still have to go through the steps one at a time or I’ll forget them. It’s a lot to remember.”

Ivan nodded and smiled back at him, restarting the problem and going back to step one. It was fine, Adrien just wanted him to grasp the steps, remember the order. Once he could do that, he was positive Ivan would be set.

“I’m sorry that I have to leave you early.”

“Don’t be, I’m glad that you’re helping me with this,” Ivan’s smile was painfully gentle and Adrien felt another wave of guilt wash over his heart and crash into the pit of his stomach.

What if making a deal with Hawkmoth was a mistake- no, no he knew it was a mistake and it was the only thought that had occupied his mind since it happened. 

He looked over Ivan’s shoulder again to make sure he was getting it, and he was. It was enough of a distraction that he hadn’t realized Lila Rossi sat behind him and was pressing the back of her heel into his chair. Just enough to be noticeable. 

And by god, did Adrien have to steel himself. He closed his eyes and counted to three and when he looked at Lila he put on the best smile he could, “Hey, what’s up? Did you need help with your math too?”

“No,” her brow twitched. “I came for something else.”

“Oh.. uh, what is it?” he tilted his head to the side and flashed his million dollar smile her way. 

There was no way in hell he was letting her get under his skin. 

Marinette wasn’t even in the room. What could Lila possibly want? 

“I just wanted to wish you luck tonight, I know that this is a huge step in your modeling career. Especially since you’ll be basically replacing your mom, that’s a whole lot of expectation. So y’know, good luck, break a leg. I’m sure the critics will have a field day.”

Lila’s eyes felt like they bore into his soul and a lump started to build in his throat. He swallowed it down forcefully, feeling Ivan’s hand gently hover over his shoulder before clasping down. It was a ground weight against the sheer force of emotions running through his veins. 

Adrien cleared his throat, “They will be, but thank you for the luck. I appreciate it,” he stared back at her and he smiled, slowly turning around to face forward. He looked over Ivan’s work, taking a moment to recollect himself. 

His eyes watered and the numbers in front of him blurred even through his blinking. 

“You didn’t have to say it like that, Lila,” Ivan said. 

“I just wanted to wish him good luck! Today is a big day, it’ll make or break his career.”

Adrien shook his head, “It’s fine, she just wanted to be nice but I uhm.. I should go, I’ll catch you up tomorrow, Ivan, I’m sorry,” he got up from the desk and collected his stuff off his desk. “Text me if you need anything, okay?”

“Adrien-” 

“I think Marinette’s also good at this if you have anymore questions..”

He needed to leave, it was a little early but he could just walk, or run, something. He smiled and quickly ducked out of the classroom.

From there it turned into a little bit of a jog, down the stairs, past the commons, and through the main entrance. He barely made it out unseen, a small stroke of luck he was incredibly grateful for. 

Why was he crying? He shouldn’t be crying but he was. Hot tears streamed down his face while he ran. One footstep after the other, until his lungs burned just like his eyes. 

He made it to the studio on shaky legs. He leaned against the brick wall for just a moment to collect himself, collect himself properly. Adrien wiped at his eyes and exhaled on a ten count, ignoring the way his breath trembled through his lips.

Adrien took a deep breath in, held his head high, and faced forward. He tilted his chin up, and with all his collected fake courage, walked into the studio. 

The place was absolutely buzzing, a mess of moving lights, people, and designers, all fretting and moving. He thought he was early, maybe it was a good idea to leave like he did.. Maybe not how, but oh well. He had to look on the brighter side, right? He was avoiding chaos.

Getting to his dressing room should have been a straight shot, he adjusted the strap of his bag on his shoulder and walked. 

It didn’t take long for his bee-line to get cut off by Megara. She positively beamed at him, taking him by the shoulders. 

“Adrien, oh I’m so glad you got here. I was just about to text and ask for you to dip outta school. Are you psychic or something?” 

Adrien smiled, and he knew it didn’t quite reach his eyes. He knew because he watched Megara’s cherry expression fall

“No, not psychic, maybe I just have really good gut feelings.”

Megara frowned at him, and Adrien picked at his bag-strap to distract himself from her gaze. Guilt churned in his stomach and he remembered that he never ate breakfast.. Or dinner. He gave her another smile. 

“Sorry I’m just.. Kind of nervous about the show.”

Her gaze softened and in seconds she was wrapping herself around him. Adrien had no choice but to hug back, wrapping his arms around her waist and tucking his face into her shoulder. 

He swallowed down another lump in his throat. How many people were going to compare him to his mother? How many critics would notice? For all Adrien knew, maybe they wouldn’t say anything in fear of his father’s reaction.

He’d be grateful for that, honestly. If the press said nothing, hell, he wouldn’t. If he knew better than shouldn’t the general public? 

“Well,” Megara said, “Lucky for you, tears are totally vogue right now. But you should go to your dressing room, I’ll be there soon to do your hair and makeup, mmkay?” She rubbed his shoulder and smiled patiently. 

“Yeah, okay,” he laughed and nodded, “I’ll see you there.”

She grinned and skipped off, probably to get her makeup case. Adrien didn’t care much, he decided right then that he was going to do everything in his power to get through that night. He was going to hold his head high, and he was going to walk across the runway like nothing was the matter, like he wasn’t replacing his mom. 

He was going to represent his father’s brand, and a small designer’s work. He wasn’t going to slip up, he wouldn’t let himself be weak, not now. Not because of Lila’s ridiculously charged comment. 

Adrien rolled his eyes on his way into his dressing room. Lila was perhaps the lesser bane of his existence. He had no idea why she had it out for Marinette, but Marinette was one of the nicest people he knew. He wasn’t going to let Lila drag her down, not anymore. 

Marinette, she was going to be at the show tonight. He left the tickets in her locker before she came to class. He didn’t want to hand them to her and have to explain the situation with his phone. 

Aha, his phone, the primary bane of his existence at that very moment. He tossed his bag onto the counter and unzipped the back pocket. 

If an object could radiate bad energy, it was the box Adrien kept his device in. It was a wooden box with a latch. He played with the latch idly. Could he still contact Hawkmoth if he held his phone? Or would he instantly be akumatized? 

He shoved the box back into his bag, that wasn’t a thought he could afford to entertain right now. He took a deep breath in and steeled his nerves, zipping up his bag once again. 

He missed Plagg, normally his Kwami filled the silence that waiting created. There’d be an infinity of cheese puns being thrown around. Instead it was silent, Adrien could probably hear a pin drop if there was one available. And it wasn’t like he could be on his phone either.

Maybe he wasn’t the brightest sometimes. He sat down in the room provided chair and put his face in his hands. Once things got moving they were going to keep moving, he should appreciate this brief interlude of quiet. 

Which was quickly interrupted, Megara burst into the room holding two boxes. She was a whirlwind, unpacking what she needed onto the counter and turning, finally, to face Adrien.

She made a square with her hands and focused on his face. So Adrien struck a pose, and she laughed. 

“God, you really are just the cutest, y’know that? I know I say this all the time, but I’m truly the luckiest designer in the whole wide world to get to work with you~” 

“And I must be the luckiest model to get to work with such an amazing designer.”

“Oi, don’t say that, it’ll just go to my head.” 

Megara clipped his hair away from his face and started on his makeup. It was actually something he really enjoyed, it was definitely the brushes against his face. It was a satisfying feeling. It wasn’t hard for him to close his eyes and relax into it. 

She put some sort of moisturizer on his skin, and then powder. A foundation came next and Adrien knew it by the smell. He tried to open his eyes but Megara tutted him, 

“No, no, let it be a suprise!! Close those eyes until I tell you to open them.”

“Okay, okay,” he laughed and closed his eyes again. 

Adrien had no idea how much time passed, but Megara told him to open his eyes and look up so he did. 

She ran a mascara wand through his lashes, making sure to coat every lash. 

“Just keep looking up.” 

“Mhm.” 

She got all of his left eye, and then his right, and she stepped back. 

She examined him with a quizzical look while he blinked the dryness out of his eyes. 

“You look. Absolutely. Perfect.”

“Why thank you, you did it yourself though.” 

“Look in the mirror!” 

Adrien turned in his chair and caught a look at himself and- wow, she made him look ten times better. She managed to erase his dark circles and bring the life back into his skin, but he figured that was his own fault. He ruined his own complexion via not eating and not sleeping. Once the show was over, and once he was through with Hawkmoth, he’d eat something. He’d go out with his friends and he would eat lunch with them, and he’d start enjoying himself again. 

“Wow, I look less like a zombie.”

“Oh, you were hardly one before,” Megara kissed her teeth and looked at her watch, “Okay. Show starts in two hours. I made adjustments to your outfit!” 

“You did?” Adrien tilted his head. 

“Mhm! I hope you like it, it’s just that, I thought we lost so much of your figure with the outfit, I decided to balance it out a little more.” 

Adrien raised his eyebrows, “Well, I’d love to see it.” 

“I was so hoping you’d say that,” she jumped back onto her heels, “We’ll put it on in a little bit but, I had one of the assistants get us a little something.” 

“You did?”

She sprinted out of the dressing room and came back in less than a minute. It was incredible. Megara moved faster than anyone else, even Marinette. But Megara wasn’t nearly as clumsy. She controlled her speed and her chaos. Adrien wondered if with time, Marinette would be the same way. 

“Ta-dah! Coffees, since we couldn’t drink them together last time.”

She held out a drink for him, the same iced caramel macchiato from the same cafe. 

He smiled and took it in his hands, 

“I figured you could use a little pep in your step, nothing caffeine and sugar can’t fix for a teenager, right?”

“I suppose not,” he smiled and took a sip- and yeah, it was very sugary, a little too intense for him but it was his first source of sustenance in what felt like too long, so he drank it. 

It was nice, he liked the caramel sauce a lot more than he thought he would. They sat in a comfortable silence together, and Adrien crossed his legs. 

He’d survive, it’d be fine. Why was he so nervous about this? It wasn’t any different from any other show he walked in. If he treated it like any other show, everything would be fine. 

“Alright chickadee, let’s get you dressed and ready to go, mmkay?”

“Okay.” 

“I’ll be right back~”

Adrien nodded and he was once again, alone. He stood up and got a better look at himself in the mirror. His skin looked better, at least. It’d photograph nicely, at least. Maybe there’d be a lot of nice pictures from this event that he could look back on later. 

Megara came back into the room with another box and a garment bag, 

“I totally forgot about your hair!” 

“Oh right, I forgot too,” Adrien laughed and sat back down, crossing his legs while Megara hung up the bag and started plugging in all of her styling tools. 

She made quick work out of styling his hair, mostly blowing it out, teasing a few pieces. 

“Alright this’ll be cold, you ever slick your hair back?”

“Only for certain events, why?” 

Megara hummed, unscrewing the cap off of what Adrien assumed was a jar of gel. She took some in her fingers and warmed it up, then used her other hand to pull the left part of his hair to the side. 

She combed through it, and Adrien shivered against the gel. She made amazing time with it though. She tilted his head to the side and combed through it a few more times before examining him. 

Adrien smiled nervously again and she stepped back, a hand on her hip, 

“Your face is totally versatile, your dad needs to book you with gigs that aren’t just his brand. God, figure out how to get into an alternative fashion shoot,” Megara blew a curl out of her face and unzipped the garment bag

He snorted, “I wouldn’t get my hopes up on that one, Meg,” he looked at himself in the mirror and whoa. 

His hair was slicked back on one side, and the rest of it was completely fluffed up. He had to say, he liked his hair fluffy, it was closer to his natural, unstyled hair, closer to his hair as Chat Noir. 

“Don’t stare at yourself too long, you’ll get a big head!” 

Adrien felt his cheeks run hot, “I just like what you did with my hair!”

“Good! It works with the asymmetry of your outfit which, by the way, we have thirty minutes to get dressed. C’mon, c’mon c’mon.”

She pushed the shirt and pants into his hands, and fled the room. 

Adrien looked down at the garments in his hands. Megara made a hell of a lot of adjustments. It wasn’t as bulky, or maybe he imagined it was bulkier before. Either way, he quickly changed and smoothed everything out. The outfit was tighter to his frame, a stretchier fabric replaced some of the bulkier bits. Megara completely scratched her efforts to emphasize his figure yet somehow still managed to do so. 

She had swapped the knit fabric for something that felt similar to organza, woven with something sparkly that caught the light a lot better than how it did before. The white part was still satin, although not beaded.

He realized that the black parts were sea through, allowing the pale of his skin to slightly show through. It was beautiful, and stretched over his frame nicely. It emphasized the protrusion of his collarbones, and the length of his neck. 

The colorblocking remained the same on the shirt and the pants, although the pants were also like the shirt, sparkly, see through, and easy to get on. It didn’t take him long to slip into the shoes, getting into them with ease and giving himself one last look in the mirror. 

If Plagg were with him, he wondered what he could say. Adrien turned to the side and kissed his teeth, ghosting a hand over the small of his front. Luckily Christmas was coming up, maybe he could put on some holiday weight- 

And then get chastised by his father for it, okay, bad idea. He shook the thought out of his mind and stepped out of the dressing room. 

Megara stared at him with eyes the size of saucers, hands reaching up to cup over her mouth. 

“Adrien,” she said, eyes watering. 

“Please don’t cry, Meg-”

“You look amazing!” She squealed and took his hands in hers, “Look at you!! Look. At. You!! You bring my art to life, your face, your eyes, your hair, your legs, ugh. Adrien.. You’re 6’2 realness and you’re sellin it to me! Get in that line, strut your stuff! I’m going to take so many pictures. Oh, Adrien!!” She wrapped her arms around him and pulled him down into a tight hug.

Adrien laughed, holding her in his arms and nestling his chin to rest atop her curly head, “I’m glad I could bring it to life for you. You’re an incredibly talented designer, and I hope that tonight, the world opens their eyes to your creativity. I’m just saying, I love shapes in clothes myself so.”

Megara snorted and gave him one last squeeze, “You’re gonna inflate my ego, kid. Go out there. Before you go on stage, take the curly bit of your hair, and scrunch it up in your hands, okay?”

“You got it boss~” Adrien chirped and turned away with a wave. If there was anything he knew how to do it was walk a runway. He got into his spot in line and he waited as the lights came down. He was sure the mc was making announcements about the event but he couldn’t hear it. His heart throbbed in his ears. 

For the first time since he was told he would walk this event in place of his mother, he was excited. The dread that drowned him for so long was finally leaving his body. 

His father was next up to give his own introduction to the show, and as he walked up they locked eyes. Adrien made sure to keep his expression pleasant and neutral, shooting his father a thumbs up before facing the model in front of him. His outfit was more classical, Adrien liked the cape on the back of it. 

He knew once his father spoke, it would be time for the show to start. 

So he remembered what his mother told him, and what Megara told him as the music cut on. 

He scrunched the fluffy part of his hair in both his hands, and then he held his chin up. 

His goal was to make it to the other side, show off Megara’s piece, it was basically a straight shot. 

When the line started moving he slipped into his usual headspace, he was comfortable, confident. 

The rush of lights came easily to him, so did walking. He kept his strides long, controlled, confident. He channeled the powerful yet elegant presence his mother used to have on that stage. He walked along to a beat he’d heard a million times before, to the shuttering and flashing cameras around him.

And just as fast as he got there, it was over. He was walking off stage and hanging a sharp right. The show he’d put so much into, and taken so much away from himself for only lasted a few minutes. He felt the tension seep out of his entire body and he leaned against the wall, tilting his head up and sighing.   
He wouldn’t be able to akumatize himself, not tonight. He’d have to keep it on schedule. 

The Christmas Party was tomorrow, he wasn’t going to miss that, not for anything. He wouldn’t mess that up for himself. 

He was tired of taking things he liked away from himself, tired of his own self-isolation from his friends. He did all of that, all of it, and he walked how he walked in any other show. 

Adrien rubbed the back of his neck. Would his mom be proud? Would she have even wanted him to walk in this event? She wouldn’t have agreed with his own isolating behavior. He was so afraid of messing this up. And for why? To prevent critics from talking? They always talked, there was no stopping them. Nothing he could do, no matter how perfect he tried to be.. What was it worth? 

“...Adrien,”

His father’s voice cut through his thoughts and Adrien looked up. 

“Yes, father?”

“You did amazing tonight, I’m proud.”

Adrien offered the best smile he could manage, if he was honest, his head was starting to hurt. Maybe it was dizziness, he wasn’t really sure. 

“Thank you.”

“I know this show has a lot more weight to it than those you’ve walked in previously, but you handled it well, I think… I think your mother would be proud.”

Adrien nodded, “I hope so..” he looked around the corner and caught Alya looming there, a smile on her face. He looked back at his father, “Hey, is it okay if I head outside to talk to my friends?”

“Of course, but people will be taking pictures if you go out in that.”

“It’s what.. Clothes were made for, right.. To go out.. In-”

“Adrien-”

He looked up at his father, the room spinning around him, 

“I’m gonna pass out.”

“Okay- I’m going to lower you onto the ground. Keep your head low, okay?”

“Mmm..”

He heard his father speaking to him, but didn’t feel himself being moved. He only felt a slight pressure on the back of his head. 

When Adrien opened his eyes again, he was slightly hunched over, head resting against something. How did he get onto the floor- he was against someone. He jerked back and hit the wall- right. He had been leaning against that earlier, right? 

“When was the last time you ate?”

“What?”

“Adrien, when was the last time you ate?” Oh god his father was talking to him. He looked around, and no. It wasn’t just his father, he wasn’t that lucky. He could see his friends standing off to the side, concerned. 

It worsened the guilt in his stomach. 

“Uhm.. I had a coffee earlier, I think.”

“That’s not food.” 

He had to think about that, when was the last time he ate something? “I.. can’t remember, it’s been a busy few days, I didn’t really have time.”

His father frowned, and Marinette came bounding over quickly, 

“Buuut, we can take him somewhere tonight and make sure he eats a nice big dinner, okay Mr. Agreste? And we’ll stop my family’s bakery afterward for dessert. We were gonna hang out anyways.”

Adrien looked between his father and Marinette, and watched his father contemplate. 

“I suppose that for tonight, given the situation it will be fine. Just get changed, Adrien.”

He was helped back up onto his feet slowly and he flashed a smile at Marinette as his father led him back to his dressing room, an arm over his shoulders. Probably a safety net. His vision was still swimming on his way in. It was a long way down from the floor in his platforms, maybe that was why he went down so fast. 

“You can’t skip meals.”

“It wasn’t purposeful, I was just.. Stressed.”

“That’s not an excuse, if you’re not taking care of yourself you’ll-”

Adrien looked up at him, “I’ll?”

“Get ill, pass out again. I’ve noticed you’ve lost a bit of weight since the start of the month.”

Adrien rolled his eyes and looked forward, “It can’t be more than five pounds, don’t worry. The show’s over and you said I did good so, I think I’ll be able to remember to eat again. I’m sorry for forgetting, but uhm.. Thank you for letting me go out tonight father, I know I’m going to be gone tomorrow, I really appreciate the time I have with my friends.” 

He didn’t look back at his father as he went to open his door, but his father stopped him. 

“Why didn’t you tell me that your phone was broken?”

“What?”

“Your phone, I found it in your bag earlier, the screen was cracked.”

Adrien felt his blood run cold and he turned around quickly, “I-.. it must’ve been nerves, or something but it broke on my morning run and I-I dunno. Got it in my head that my phone had an akuma in it or something? I should stop reading the news at night. I also figured that with the show coming up I didn’t need more distractions at the time. I was gonna tell you tonight, actually.”

His father’s brows raised and Adrien sighed, facing the door completely. 

“I understand that this month has been stressful, and I don’t blame you at all. I just wished you would’ve told me so I could have replaced it sooner. Here, it’s programmed with your old sim card and should have all of your pictures in tact.”

Adrien turned quick enough for his father to hand him a smartphone, the same make and model as his old one. 

“Don’t break this one.”

“Yessir..”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> thank u.. sm for reaidng. so this was supposed to be the last chapter but i was really stuck in writer's block for while. the cure wsas animal crossing, btw. acnh cures all. i digress, this is like the last. plot heavy chapter, it's just fluff and friendship times from here bc im a big ol WUSS. 
> 
> i hope u enjoyed this chapter!! the last two r going to be, the day before friendmas dinner and then friendmas! if u have any questions abt me, this series, or anythin else, my askbox is open on my tumblr. @chattonlait.tumblr.com
> 
> I also wanted to thank you all for your kind comments! They kept me motivated to write this monster in a really dark time, I appreciate all of u and am hoarding these comments in my inbox foreva

**Author's Note:**

> Thank you so much for reading! This iss sort of a weird idea I had after reading copius amounts of stuff on tumblr. there's no way adrien can keep pulling himself so thin, guess when u like a character u gotta break 'em.
> 
> if u liked this, pls feel free 2 comment bc i live.. for attention.. thankies.


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